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"Sandra Brown, M.A." Articles

Relationship Articles Read her articles Here

Relationship Articles

Abuse Articles
ABUSE SURVIVAL KIT.
6/9/2006
ABUSE TOWARDS WOMEN
6/9/2006
Are They An Anti-Social Emotional Vampire?
4/28/2006
Are You In An Abusive Relationship?
4/28/2006
Breaking Free of Explotive Relationships: TRAUMA
4/28/2006
Characteristics of a Misogynist
4/28/2006
CHECKLIST: Are You A Victim Of Abuse?
4/28/2006
CONTROL FREAKS: Trampling Privacy & Boundaries
6/9/2006
Domestic Violence and Women with Disabilities
5/30/2005
Emotional Abuse Causes Depression
6/9/2006
Emotional Rape Syndrome
4/27/2006
Father butchers wife & stabs 8 yr old son, WA
10/29/2004
Favorite Phrases of a "Player"
5/30/2005
From The Abuser's Point of View
4/26/2006
How 'They' View Their World
4/28/2006
How Borderlines Abuse Others
4/28/2006
I Thought Everything Was My Fault
4/28/2006
In Sheep's Clothing: Covert-Aggression
4/27/2006
Is He Abusive? (Characteristics)
6/9/2006
Is He Really Changing? How Can I Tell?
4/26/2006
Is Your Partner A Narcissist?
4/28/2006
Jerks who fuck with your mind
5/30/2005
Let Go of Abuse-Coping Behaviors Holding You Back
4/28/2006
Sex Addict Behaviors
5/30/2005
Signs of Emotional Abuse
5/30/2005
The Boiling Frog
6/9/2006
The Devaluation Funhouse
6/9/2006
Traumatic Bonding: The Betrayal Bond
4/28/2006
Verbal Abuse As Damaging As Physical Abuse
4/28/2006
Warning Signs of an Abusive Personality
5/30/2005
What To Do When Your 'Worm' Comes Crawling Back
4/26/2006
When You Keep Thinking And Hoping He'll Change
4/28/2006
When Your Perfect Partner Goes Perfectly WRONG
4/28/2006
Will The Games End When I Leave?
4/26/2006
You Are Nothing But An Object....
6/9/2006
Cheating Statistics
Affairs
12/10/2004
American Sex Lives-2004 ABC Airing
10/21/2004
An un-fucking believable article-VERY INTERESTING!
2/2/2005
Why Men Cheat
12/2/2005
Dating Advice
Bad Relationships - How did I get so stupid?
5/30/2005
How To Spot A Married Man on a Dating Site
6/9/2006
If he doesn't call, it means...
11/8/2004
Signs she is about to dump you
6/13/2006
You Think He'll be Different with You
6/8/2005
Divorce
Dealing With An Abuser During the Divorce
4/28/2006
Divorce Statistics
10/7/2004
Hiring An Attorney
6/9/2006
How to Win When Facing Divorce
10/7/2004
Japan's Divorce Rate Hits All Time High
10/4/2004
What Is Mental Cruelty?
6/9/2006
Your REAL Chance of Divorce
10/7/2004
Gender Difference Studies
How Male and Female Brains Differ
4/27/2005
Men Lie More Than Women?
1/31/2006
General Relationship Articles
Are You Addicted to Bad Relationships?
4/28/2006
BOLD FACED LIARS
6/9/2006
BUT I LOVE HIM & MISS HIM!!
6/9/2006
Confusing Love With Obsession
4/28/2006
DENIAL: What is it? What does it look like?
6/9/2006
Emotional Dynamics in Dysfunctional Relationships
6/9/2006
Getting the Attention you Want
10/7/2004
How Can I Help The Bordeline In My Life
7/17/2006
Oprah's Opinion about Men
11/3/2005
Pornography Addiction - The Progression
6/22/2005
The (How Not To Be A) Bad Lover List
4/28/2006
What is Emotional Rape
6/9/2006
Women & The Disease to Please
4/28/2006
Healthy Relationship Articles
Basic Needs in Relationships
6/9/2006
Keys to a Healthy Relationship
10/1/2004
Meeting Your Partner's Needs
10/7/2004
What is REAL Love?
10/30/2004
What is REAL Love? Part II
10/30/2004
You Deserve a GOOD BOY!
4/26/2006
Internet Cheating Articles
Are You A Victim of Sweetheart Fraud?
4/27/2006
Bi-Polars and Internet Relationships
4/27/2006
Can You Surf Without Wiping Out?
10/7/2004
Cyber Cheating - A Growing Cause of Divorce
10/7/2004
Dating Sites Sued for Fraud
4/27/2006
Gordon B. Hinkley, Pres. LDS Church (The Mormons)
10/27/2004
How To Seduce Women Online
4/27/2006
Is Cybersex Cheating?
6/9/2006
LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
6/9/2006
Online Dating Attracts Married Folks
10/7/2004
Profile of the Mental Rapist
4/27/2006
Red Flags to Watch Out for When On-Line Dating
6/13/2005
Serial "Web Romeo" Sued Over Kooky Come-Ons
9/30/2005
The Cyber Lothario
4/27/2006
The Cyber-Narcissist
4/27/2006
The Lures of the Online Predator
4/26/2006
The Online Disinhibition Effect
4/28/2006
Virtual Relationships & Online Betrayals
4/28/2006
Warnings Signs of Love/Sex/Cybersex Addictions
4/28/2006
We Just Clicked
10/7/2004
Marriage Articles
Marrying Later in Life Lessens Chances of Divorce
11/16/2005
Nomarriagedotcom
10/14/2004
Medical Articles
Adult Immunizations
7/28/2006
All About AntiDepressants
7/28/2006
Bariatric Surgery/Gastric Bypass
7/28/2006
BOTOX
7/28/2006
Endometriosis
7/28/2006
Epileptic Seizures
7/28/2006
Herbal Remedies
7/28/2006
Intermittent Explosive Disorder
6/9/2006
LASIK and other refractive surgeries
7/28/2006
Social Anxiety Disorder
7/28/2006
Suicide Information
7/28/2006
The Physical Symptoms of Depression
4/28/2006
The Pill & Breast Cancer?
7/28/2006
Urinary Tract Infections
7/28/2006
Viagra/Levitra/Cialis - Long Term Effects?
7/28/2006
What is depersonalization disorder?
04/28/2006
What Is Shared Psychotic Disorder?
4/28/2006
When Someone Threatens Suicide
7/28/2006
Women & Depression
4/28/2006
Men's Advice for Women
Americanwomensuckdotcom
10/29/2004
Men's Top 10 Rules for Women
10/19/2004
The Art of Seduction (How they do it)
5/30/2005
Men's Relationship Articles
Breaking Up Is Hard On Men, Too
11/2/2004
Domestic Abuse Against Men
4/28/2006
What Porn Teaches Men About Women
6/9/2006
Miscellaneous
CELL PHONE DATA NEVER DIES
8/30/2006
Cyberstalking in the 21st Century
5/30/2005
Did You Have An Emotionally Abusive Mother?
6/9/2006
How to Deal With an Overbearing Mother
5/30/2005
How To Pass A Lie Detector Test
4/28/2006
IDENTITY THEFT: Protect Yourself!
6/9/2006
Is It Legal to Expose a Cheater or Abuser Online?
4/26/2006
Man Convicted for having Sex with Cows
2/27/2005
Man dies from ruptured colon from sex with horse
7/20/2005
Man gets the ULTIMATE Revenge!
11/17/2005
MySpace & Related Sites: Safety Tips
4/28/2006
New 3' Human
10/27/2004
The Heavy Cost of Chronic Stress
4/28/2006
There's No Excuse to Avoid Counseling
6/9/2006
You Can't Fight Depression On Your Own
4/28/2006
News
A drug that induces love may be in the near future
7/27/2005
Japanese Develop "Female" Android
7/27/2005
National Singles Week Sept 21-27
10/4/2004
Online Dating Sites Sued for Fraud
4/28/2006
Rape Statistics
Rape Facts & Statistics
6/29/2005
Rape Survival, Defense and Healing
10/27/2004
The Facts & Statistics about Rape
5/30/2005
Sex Articles
10 Steps to Picking Up Girls
6/9/2006
Porn Use and Sex Crimes
5/30/2005
What Are Paraphilias?
4/28/2006
WHO ARE THE MEN BUYING PROSTITUTES?
4/28/2006
Sex Laws
Worldwide Sexual Age of Consent Chart
10/28/2004
Sexual Infidelity Articles
Cake Men (Men who want their cake & to eat it too)
10/1/2004
Don't Have an Affair with a Married Man
11/27/2004
Infidelity - A Form of Abuse
5/30/2005
MEN & PROSTITUTES
4/28/2006
Prostitution Flourishes Online
4/27/2006
The "Other Woman" - What's she like?
10/12/2004
The Monogamy Myth
12/10/2004
Why Spouses Stray
11/5/2004
Why Women Cheat
4/26/2005
You're Joined the Adulterers Club!
8/30/2006
Single Women
Best Cities in America for Singles
7/27/2005
How to Life a Romantic Life Without a Relationship
9/8/2005
Japanese women staying single by the droves
11/16/2004
More Single Women, than Married in NYC
10/14/2004
Single By Choice
10/4/2004
Single Mother's in US sky rockets
10/14/2004
Single Women Have 35% of Babies
12/3/2004
Surviving Infidelity
5 Things You SHOULDN'T DO If He's Cheating On You
6/9/2006
Comparisons With the Other Woman
4/28/2006
Emotional Detachment
4/28/2006
Falling Apart Safely After the Break-Up
6/9/2006
Keys to Personal Recovery
10/7/2004
RECOVERY FROM THE RELATIONSHIP
6/9/2006
Some Thoughts on Healing from the Relationship
6/9/2006
The "Need to Know"
4/28/2006
Top 10 Reasons to Expose A Cheater or Abuser
4/28/2006
When Your Perfect Partner Goes Perfectly Wrong
6/9/2006
Websites that help cheaters
Ashley Madison: When Monogamy Becomes Monotony
12/10/2004
Fast Seduction
4/26/2006
HOW 2 SWIFTLY DETECT & ELIMINATE WACKY WOMEN
4/28/2006
Meet 2 Cheat!
10/4/2004
Philanderers.com
12/10/2004
Secrets of Sexual Addiction
4/26/2006
The Erotic Review (TER)
12/11/2004
Website helps men cheat on their partners
10/4/2004
Women Over 40
Andy Rooney's View of Women Over 40
10/7/2004
Written or quoted by Little Miss WomanSaver
7 Signs of How to Tell if It's Just a Spring Break
4/25/2006
Show Instead of Tell
9/13/2006
The Boiling Frog

Here‘s an interesting story that has been told several thousands of times and is still intriguing. It‘s based on a scientific experiment and is therefore repeatable.

First. A frog is put into a pot of water. The water happens to be boiling. The frog jumps out of the water immediately. If the water level is low, the frog still jumps as vehemently as he possibly could and gets out of the pot.

Second. The same frog is put into a pot of water. This time the water is pleasant. The frog is lying happily and enjoying his time. The water in the pot is slowly heated. At points, the frog does get upset but doesn‘t do much. The temperature keeps rising. There comes a time when the water is boiling, and it‘s too late for the frog to jump out since he can almost not do anything in water as hot as that. The frog is boiled. Alive.

Now, what really does that tell us? It has one of the most profound lesson related to change. That change is not noticed when it occurs over a relatively long timeframe, although the same change is taken notice of if the timeframe is shorter, is one of the most familiar mockery of life. And this story describes it in the most effective manner. We are all frogs, waiting to be boiled in water of some kind of the other - be it health, relationships, technical competency, or plain simple habits.

Think about one significant change in your life. Something that has changed your life profoundly. Now, try to recall a point when that change started, how long did it last, and when it was concluded. Most people would answer that the change did not start intentionally - or even if it did, they cannot point out the first moment "after the change". Most significant changes happen over a long or relatively long period of time. And finally, there are seldom examples of being able to point out a specific moment in lift when the change was concluded. To summarize this, the change is constant.

Now, what‘s new here? We have been hearing/reading/and even writing this "change is constant" thing all of our life! The point here is not to prove that the change is constant, it is rather to prove that the change is not noticed constantly.

Let‘s see some examples.

Try to think of someone around you - or yourself if applicable - who from being a normal, healthy person gradually transformed into being overweight. When did this start? When was it noticed? Did all that transformation happen in a day or a week or even a month? Why was it not noticed all that while?
Try to think of a neighborhood that changed its identity - for better or worse. When did it start? You could recall now perhaps. But did you notice it at that time?
Try to think of an organization doing well and later going bankrupt. When did the descent start? How long did it take to sink?

And there are several more. The point is not when a particular change starts. The point is when the change is gradual it is often ignored or goes unnoticed. The change then accelerates and gets traction. Soon many more things around start changing. The rate at which things change is exponential, i.e. all the changes taken place so far provides further support and push to the new changes. Very soon complete transformation is noticed. Yes, noticed. That is when it is noticed. It is too sad that everything is beyond repair at this point.

The key to avoid it is to keep a constant watch on everything that is changing. Driving habits, eating habits, sleeping patterns, relationships and friendships, coding habits. Everything. One useful thing that could be done is listening to an external observer, like a close friend. The friend knows you, and can see the change externally and therefore notices it. It may seem paradoxical to read at first since just in the previous paragraph, I said change is hard to notice when they are gradual. However, when seen externally, change is noticed earlier than internally.


http://groups.msn.com/WebofNarcissism/theboilingfrog.msnw

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