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"Sandra Brown, M.A." Articles

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Relationship Articles

Abuse Articles
Are They An Anti-Social Emotional Vampire?
Are You In An Abusive Relationship?
Breaking Free of Explotive Relationships: TRAUMA
Characteristics of a Misogynist
CHECKLIST: Are You A Victim Of Abuse?
CONTROL FREAKS: Trampling Privacy & Boundaries
Domestic Violence and Women with Disabilities
Emotional Abuse Causes Depression
Emotional Rape Syndrome
Father butchers wife & stabs 8 yr old son, WA
Favorite Phrases of a "Player"
From The Abuser's Point of View
How 'They' View Their World
How Borderlines Abuse Others
I Thought Everything Was My Fault
In Sheep's Clothing: Covert-Aggression
Is He Abusive? (Characteristics)
Is He Really Changing? How Can I Tell?
Is Your Partner A Narcissist?
Jerks who fuck with your mind
Let Go of Abuse-Coping Behaviors Holding You Back
Sex Addict Behaviors
Signs of Emotional Abuse
The Boiling Frog
The Devaluation Funhouse
Traumatic Bonding: The Betrayal Bond
Verbal Abuse As Damaging As Physical Abuse
Warning Signs of an Abusive Personality
What To Do When Your 'Worm' Comes Crawling Back
When You Keep Thinking And Hoping He'll Change
When Your Perfect Partner Goes Perfectly WRONG
Will The Games End When I Leave?
You Are Nothing But An Object....
Cheating Statistics
American Sex Lives-2004 ABC Airing
Why Men Cheat
Dating Advice
Bad Relationships - How did I get so stupid?
How To Spot A Married Man on a Dating Site
If he doesn't call, it means...
Signs she is about to dump you
You Think He'll be Different with You
Dealing With An Abuser During the Divorce
Divorce Statistics
Hiring An Attorney
How to Win When Facing Divorce
Japan's Divorce Rate Hits All Time High
What Is Mental Cruelty?
Your REAL Chance of Divorce
Gender Difference Studies
How Male and Female Brains Differ
Men Lie More Than Women?
General Relationship Articles
Are You Addicted to Bad Relationships?
Confusing Love With Obsession
DENIAL: What is it? What does it look like?
Emotional Dynamics in Dysfunctional Relationships
Getting the Attention you Want
How Can I Help The Bordeline In My Life
Oprah's Opinion about Men
Pornography Addiction - The Progression
The (How Not To Be A) Bad Lover List
What is Emotional Rape
Women & The Disease to Please
Healthy Relationship Articles
Basic Needs in Relationships
Keys to a Healthy Relationship
Meeting Your Partner's Needs
What is REAL Love?
What is REAL Love? Part II
You Deserve a GOOD BOY!
Internet Cheating Articles
Are You A Victim of Sweetheart Fraud?
Bi-Polars and Internet Relationships
Can You Surf Without Wiping Out?
Cyber Cheating - A Growing Cause of Divorce
Dating Sites Sued for Fraud
Gordon B. Hinkley, Pres. LDS Church (The Mormons)
How To Seduce Women Online
Is Cybersex Cheating?
Online Dating Attracts Married Folks
Profile of the Mental Rapist
Red Flags to Watch Out for When On-Line Dating
Serial "Web Romeo" Sued Over Kooky Come-Ons
The Cyber Lothario
The Cyber-Narcissist
The Lures of the Online Predator
The Online Disinhibition Effect
Virtual Relationships & Online Betrayals
Warnings Signs of Love/Sex/Cybersex Addictions
We Just Clicked
Marriage Articles
Marrying Later in Life Lessens Chances of Divorce
Medical Articles
Adult Immunizations
All About AntiDepressants
Bariatric Surgery/Gastric Bypass
Epileptic Seizures
Herbal Remedies
Intermittent Explosive Disorder
LASIK and other refractive surgeries
Social Anxiety Disorder
Suicide Information
The Physical Symptoms of Depression
The Pill & Breast Cancer?
Urinary Tract Infections
Viagra/Levitra/Cialis - Long Term Effects?
What is depersonalization disorder?
What Is Shared Psychotic Disorder?
When Someone Threatens Suicide
Women & Depression
Men's Advice for Women
Men's Top 10 Rules for Women
The Art of Seduction (How they do it)
Men's Relationship Articles
Breaking Up Is Hard On Men, Too
Domestic Abuse Against Men
What Porn Teaches Men About Women
Cyberstalking in the 21st Century
Did You Have An Emotionally Abusive Mother?
How to Deal With an Overbearing Mother
How To Pass A Lie Detector Test
IDENTITY THEFT: Protect Yourself!
Is It Legal to Expose a Cheater or Abuser Online?
Man Convicted for having Sex with Cows
Man dies from ruptured colon from sex with horse
Man gets the ULTIMATE Revenge!
MySpace & Related Sites: Safety Tips
New 3' Human
The Heavy Cost of Chronic Stress
There's No Excuse to Avoid Counseling
You Can't Fight Depression On Your Own
A drug that induces love may be in the near future
Japanese Develop "Female" Android
National Singles Week Sept 21-27
Online Dating Sites Sued for Fraud
Rape Statistics
Rape Facts & Statistics
Rape Survival, Defense and Healing
The Facts & Statistics about Rape
Sex Articles
Porn Use and Sex Crimes
What Are Paraphilias?
Sex Laws
Worldwide Sexual Age of Consent Chart
Sexual Infidelity Articles
Cake Men (Men who want their cake & to eat it too)
Don't Have an Affair with a Married Man
Infidelity - A Form of Abuse
Prostitution Flourishes Online
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The "Other Woman" - What's she like?
The Monogamy Myth
Why Spouses Stray
Why Women Cheat
You're Joined the Adulterers Club!
Single Women
Best Cities in America for Singles
How to Life a Romantic Life Without a Relationship
Japanese women staying single by the droves
More Single Women, than Married in NYC
Single By Choice
Single Mother's in US sky rockets
Single Women Have 35% of Babies
Surviving Infidelity
5 Things You SHOULDN'T DO If He's Cheating On You
Comparisons With the Other Woman
Emotional Detachment
Falling Apart Safely After the Break-Up
Keys to Personal Recovery
Some Thoughts on Healing from the Relationship
The "Need to Know"
Top 10 Reasons to Expose A Cheater or Abuser
When Your Perfect Partner Goes Perfectly Wrong
Websites that help cheaters
Ashley Madison: When Monogamy Becomes Monotony
Fast Seduction
Meet 2 Cheat!
Secrets of Sexual Addiction
The Erotic Review (TER)
Website helps men cheat on their partners
Women Over 40
Andy Rooney's View of Women Over 40
Written or quoted by Little Miss WomanSaver
7 Signs of How to Tell if It's Just a Spring Break
Show Instead of Tell
CHECKLIST: Are You A Victim Of Abuse?

The Extensive Domestic Violence Checklist Revised Aug. 1999 This list identifies a series of behaviors typically demonstrated by batterers and abusive people. All of these forms of abuse come from the batterer‘s desire for power and control.

The list can help you recognize if you or someone you know is in a violent relationship. Check off those behaviors that apply to the relationship.

The more checks on the page, the more dangerous the situation may be.

1. Blames me for everything that goes wrong in our relationship, blames me for his mistakes most of which are the most preposterous things.

2. Threatens to kill me or have others kill me.

3. Threatens to leave me all the time

4. Has threatened to commit suicide.

5. Threatens to report me to welfare authorities.

6. Is using my immigration status against me and I fear deportation.

7. Makes me afraid by looks, actions or gestures.

8. Displays weapon, shows weapons to make me afraid.

9. Limits my freedom, tells me what to do, where to go, and when to come back.

10. Makes all the decisions.

11. Won‘t let you have friends, or judges your friends and family harshly, says bad things about your friends or family to others.

12. Becomes angry for no apparent reason. I feel any action on my behalf can cause him to erupt.

13. Blames me when I am mistreated. Says, "I provoked it!"

14. Threatens to harm my children, family, or friends.

15. Takes my car keys or prevents me from using the car.

16. Insists I dress in a more sexual way than I want to or just the opposite, that I wear clothes that make me look ugly so no one will look at me.

17. He publicly shows interest in other women.

18. Insults my most valued beliefs, religion, race, heritage or ethical background.

19. Punishs or deprives the children when he is angry with me.

20. Tells me about his affairs in order to destroy my emotional well being.

21. Monitors my phone calls, or mail, or the odometer mileage.

22. Refuses to give me money or takes my money.

23. Interferes with my work or will not let me work.

24. Has exclusive control over our money and the household finances.

25. Uses pressure tactics to rush me into making decisions through guilt-tripping and other forms of intimidation.

26. Calls me a cunt, whore, slut, bitch or other sexual demeaning names.

27. He tells me that I am not worth having as a mate, yet will not consider breaking it off.

28. He has raped me.

29. Exposed me to venereal disease, STD‘s, or AIDS

30. Forced prostitution or strip dancing. Or uses prostitutes and strippers.

31. Forced me to look at pornography or be apart of it when I did not want to.

32. We have hurtful or uncomfortable sex.

33. He pressures me for sex.

34. He withholds sex as a measure to make me feel asexual, or tells me what a lousy lover I am.

35. He will not let me use contraception.

36. He cheats on me...(Cyber-sex on the computer counts!)

37. Our sex is humiliating/or at times sadistic that I am fearful.

38. When I ask him questions about things that are legitimately my business ...I get no answers or the run-around.

39. He demands that I obey him.

40. Becomes angry when I tell him, he is drinking or drugging to much.

41. Becomes upset if dinner, housework, or laundry was not done exactly the way he thinks it should be.

42. Overreacts to little things like the toilet paper is going the wrong way, and retaliates by doing or saying something hurtful to me.

43. Tells me I really cannot manage without him or take care of myself.

44. He acts like I am his personal servant.

45. Says bad things about me to friends, family or coworkers.

46. Twist my words around and will not let me explain the correct thing that I was I saying.

47. Tells me that all my problems are because I am worthless, and can‘t manage to do anything right.

48. Shows disrespect by interrupting and changing the topic.

49. Abuses authority by always claiming to be right.

50. Manipulates the children.

51. Shoved me

52. Pushed me.

53. Restrained me so I could not move.

54. Hit me.

55. Slap me around.

56. Bit me.

57. Choked me.

58. Kicked me.

59. Tripped me.

60. Pulled my hair.

61. Punched me with his fist.

62. Acted like a bully toward me.

63. Treated me like I was stupid.

64. Pinched me.

65. Squeezed me until there was pain.

66. Jerked me around.

67. Shook me.

68. Burned me.

69. Choked/or suffocated me.

70. Thrown objects or food at me.

71. Abused drugs or alcohol and pressures me to take them.

72. Abused the children.

73. Abused the pets.

74. Throws things at me.

75. Punches our walls.

76. There are qualities about myself that I like but he disapproves of or ridicules me.

77. Criticizes my body parts, for example, tell me I am ugly, or fat, or unattractive.

78. Calls me names, swears or makes humiliating gestures.

79. Makes me feel guilty.

80. He makes me think I am going crazy at times.

81. Plays mind games with my head.

82. Humiliates or makes fun of me in front of other people.

83. Says that I belong to him, that he can‘t live without me, no one else can ever have me.

84. Ignores me, withholds approval.

85. Lies, withholds information form me.

86. Breaks promises, does not follow through on agreements.

87. Completely isolates himself from me.

88. Keeps me away from my family or friends or he must come with me all the time.

89. He thinks I am with another man if I am not at home or when he calls.

90. Checked up on me.

91. I was not allowed to make family decisions or settle conflicts by talking things out.

92. He sulked a lot.

93. Does not take fair share of responsibilities.

94. Said the abuse did not happen, denies it.

95. Demanded I stay home/or won‘t let me go back to school, work and, etc.,

96. Became angry if I disagree with his point of view.

97. Beaten me so badly that I needed medical help.

98. Screamed and yelled at me.

99. Made me feel guilty about the children.

100. I always had to yield to my partners needs.

101. My family and friends are concerned about my safety.

102. Cut or stabbed me.

103. Broke my teeth.

104. Abused my stomach when pregnant.

105. Used weapons on me.

106. Hit me with an object.

107. Ripped my clothes off.

108. Abandoned me in dangerous places.

109. Used the children to relay his messages.

110. Threatened to take the children away.

111. He defined the roles of men and women, what they do within a relationship.

112. He thought he was master of the castle and that he could do anything he wants.

113. Did not let me know our income, properties we own, or money problems.

114. Has mood swing behavior patterns, one minute my mate is sweet and caring then will do a complete about face and be angry about things that were totally O.K. before. Switches back and forth between behavior for no apparent reasons.

115. Makes me think I am responsible for making this relationship work.

116. I fear he will track me down and kill me if I leave.

117. He has threatened to put me in a mental hospital, or insists that I am unstable or crazy.

118. Stands in the doorway during an argument as if to say you are staying her and not leaving.

119. He buys things in my name and not his.

120. He digs in my purse, my computer and in my private things.

121. His acts of irresponsibility threaten my credit.

122. He explains his abusive actions by blaming his violence or his temper because of his stress at work, or external factors.

This list may be used for public distribution..in order to help those in need. This Checklist was based on the fact that 97% of all Domestic Abuse Cases are Women.

* All break up and relationship articles are the property of their owners. All WomanSavers relationship articles are copyright of the individual authors, unless specified. http://www.WomanSavers.com is not responsible or liable for the accuracy and/or content of the women's relationship and break up articles displayed on this site. Submitted relationship articles for women to be included, but not limited, to the categories of: relationship articles, break up articles, abuse articles, cheating statistics, dating advice articles, divorce articles, gender difference studies, healthy relationship articles, internet cheating articles, marriage articles, medical articles, men's advice for women, men's relationship articles, miscellaneous articles, relationship news articles, rape statistics articles, sex articles, sex laws, sexual infidelity articles, single women articles, surviving infidelity articles, websites that help cheaters, women over 40.

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