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kaylar
  Posted: 9/25/2009 8:59 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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kingston
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Barber looks like a squashed prune.  However old his is chronologically he seems above 60.

Anna is nineteen, she glows with youth and promise.
She is asking him about planting peppers in her patch
of garden.  

Barber‘s wife is dangling from the window; watching him
like a hawk.  Obviously believing that if she takes her
eye off, he‘ll have an affair with Anna.

Anna is laughing, it is all so comical.  And those of us who see Anna and Barber have to admit, that Barber‘s wife is
so ridiculous; for no one can even see Barber as a ‘man‘ beyond the designated bathroom.

Maybe when he was young he looked good, maybe
even up until he was thirty or maybe forty he had some
allure. But now?  He‘s repulsive.

But, no doubt he had lots of affairs with lots of women,
which is why Barber‘s wife is dangling from the second
story window.

Now it is later, when we are laughing at Barber and his
wife, that the tragedy of that wife impacts.  And we have to reflect on ourselves, and our choices, and other people
and their choices.

N E V E R  become Barber‘s wife.

If your man can‘t keep his pants on, get out. Get out
and be alone.  It is better to be without Barber, than
become the laughing stock.

So many times in my life I‘ve run into women who are
‘defending‘ their ‘ownership‘ of a man. 

My secretary has to ring up men like Barber and as the
phone is answered she must quickly state who she is
why she is calling, before getting an earful of; "What
you calling my husband for, gal?"

Women who stay with men like Barber might as well
buy Bozo suits, because they are doomed to be clowns.
Doomed to having to spend their lives walking behind
him, watching his every interaction.




Funnysl
  Posted: 9/25/2009 11:14 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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sunshine and daisies
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OMG this is so true.

I have witnessed this lately with the hoor that my ex is with.

The law firm that I am dealing with had to call him to confirm a mediation and it was a 3 way call between  him, the lady for the law firm and myself.

The hoor answered his cell phone and was very rude and demanded to know who it was and what she wanted.

I have been told if his phone rings she will snatch it out of his hand to see who it is.

I will never live my life like that!!



kaylar
  Posted: 9/26/2009 7:40 PM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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kingston
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She knows he is garbage. She knows he can‘t keep
his pants on. That‘s how she got him. Now she will
spend her life policing her ‘property‘.

The older he gets, the uglier be becomes, the stupidier
she looks trying to exert ownership.


Xani
  Posted: 9/29/2009 2:48 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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Wow, that was depressing.  Is that true, that if your husband cheats and you take him back, that you are considered the laughing stock if you don‘t trust him right away?

kaylar
  Posted: 9/29/2009 8:10 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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kingston
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Many women who know their husband can‘t
keep his pants on, spend their lives running
behind him.

As years pass, they continue this ‘policing‘
so that they turn into clowns; for who would
be attracted to a guy who looks like a squashed
prune?

There are only two ways to deal with a man
who can‘t keep his pants on;

Divorce him and move on or assume he‘s having
sex with all manner of two legged, four legged and
six legged creatures, and never have sex with him
without protection.

To stay with a man you can‘t trust makes you into
a fool when you have to ‘watch‘ him.




Funnysl
  Posted: 9/29/2009 8:54 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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sunshine and daisies
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Xani wrote:
Wow, that was depressing.  Is that true, that if your husband cheats and you take him back, that you are considered the laughing stock if you don‘t trust him right away?


I don‘t believe that is set in stone.  I do believe there are some men that truly regret what they have done and they never cheat again.

I also know that it takes a long time to gain trust back.

The person I was talking about is one of the hoors that my ex cheated with.  she will never trust him because she knows what he is capable of and he knows that she is willing to screw somebody elses man.  So they will never trust each other.



kaylar
  Posted: 9/30/2009 8:37 AM Subject: The Woman You  D O N T want to be
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kingston
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Let me put it this way; suppose you wer the one who cheated.
Why did you do it?

Imagine this slowly; don‘t rush.  The man, the where the how the when, step by step.  
Imagine you were the one having the affair...
...............................................................................................................
..............................................................................................................
Okay.
Why did you do it?
Take your time...it has to make some form of sense, whether you can put it
into words, into feelings, into sensation....get the Why......
...........................................................................................................................
.........................................................................................................................

Now, can you say that it would never happen again?
Honestly.
Either with the same man or a different man?
If the same set of variables occurred, would it be possible for you to
do it again?

Be honest.  Spend a few minutes going back and forth over it,
understanding the how and why of it.  

Sometimes, in your own life, you can see how something could
happen, and even though you didn‘t act on the temptation, the
temptation WAS there.  Now the point is...if the temptation isn‘t
all that great...or if there isn‘t the opportunity...

The point of the exercise; he acted on the temptation. How do you
know he won‘t do it again?  If it was one of those ‘one offs‘....
hubby in Iraq, gets involved with someone; you in hospital, he
takes the edge off with someone, one of those situations in which
you are not there; then yes, forgive him.  Because YOU were not
there.  If YOU had been there, he‘d never have used a surrogate.

But if you‘re in the kitchen preparing his favourite meal, expecting
him home from work at 6 pm, and he‘s screwing a thing he met
at the bar because he leaves work at 4pm on Friday so he can
screw something...you‘re a fool.

Most men are truly sorry...
they got caught.
If you hadn‘t caught them things would be perfect.
They will give up the slut, or make you believe they will give up
the slut, because they need to be married to commit adultery.

Now you can forgive him, believe him, and ‘trust‘ him, so that
you won‘t be dangling from the window making a clown out
of yourself.

If you can‘t do that; if you can‘t convince yourself it will never
happen again, if you can‘t convince yourself it was a one off,
if you can‘t trust him to the extent that you aren‘t running
behind him...fine.


 



 


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