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| CaliforniaGirl |
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Posted: 8/22/2009 11:34 AM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 3
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Total Posts: 1711
Women and Cats
California
United States
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Players do not fall in love. They just like to have a lot of women to choose from. He will have no problem letting you go. Tell him this is not the relationship for you and wish him well. Then ignore all his tries to get you into bed.
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| WiserNow2 |
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Posted: 8/22/2009 3:11 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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New WomanSaver
Female Member
Age: 53
Total Posts: 2
rural
Indiana
United States
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Thank you for your insight....that is exactly what I hoped to hear. The resources on this website are amazing, and the input from all the members invaluable! I am so grateful for it!!
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| Busty Spumonte |
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Posted: 8/22/2009 5:19 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 81
Total Posts: 2466
Camp Getty Stuckie
Ethiopia
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It seems like he does stay friends with the many woman in his past. This is not always a bad thing as you seem to want more of friendship than a romance partner in him. You just tell him exactly how you feel. You never know... he may become a wonderful friend you can go out to eat with, take in a show, share your stories with and confide in when you need to. If however he gets wierd on you...cut him off completely!
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| kaylar |
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Posted: 8/22/2009 7:44 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 57
Total Posts: 430
kingston
Jamaica
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You wanted a meaningless relationship with a man you couldn‘t love. That‘s what you got. Maybe he wants more than one meaningless relationship...and to be honest, you should have more than one meaningless relationship so as to avoid getting into the monogamy bag.
Very vew meaningless relationships work...this is because one of the parties breaks the contract by making it have meaning.
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| uberbeotch |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 11:43 AM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 489
Total Posts: 1257
In a Dark Castle
Belarus
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It‘s not a matter if "will he let me go?"
If you are DONE, then YOU need to let HIM go.
That means - BYE BYE & NO CONTACT. Maybe you can be "friends" down the road, but not now. Tell him you are done, and not to contact you any more - no phone calls, no emails, no texts, nothing.
Stay away from this guy for at least a year or more - get him out of your system! Maybe then you will find that you no longer even want to be friends.
Good luck!
UB
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| uberbeotch |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 11:44 AM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 489
Total Posts: 1257
In a Dark Castle
Belarus
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| kaylar wrote: | You wanted a meaningless relationship with a man you couldn‘t love. That‘s what you got. Maybe he wants more than one meaningless relationship...and to be honest, you should have more than one meaningless relationship so as to avoid getting into the monogamy bag.
Very vew meaningless relationships work...this is because one of the parties breaks the contract by making it have meaning.
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Well said!
UB
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| WiserNow2 |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 12:17 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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New WomanSaver
Female Member
Age: 53
Total Posts: 2
rural
Indiana
United States
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UB - I know, I AM ready to let go. I have spent my weekend writing that final email and making sure it was clear what my boundaries are and that there is no further opportunity or chance here. I took 2 days off work to make sure he doesn‘t jump in his vehicle and drive back here to have a dramatic confrontation, quite possibly at my office. It is a matter of when to hit that send button, a timing thing.
I am covering all my bases, what I know about him is that he may see this as his last chance.....I remind him oh so much of his wife of 30 years and the things he really valued in her. What concerns me is that he was upfront (from his email history that I read) with the many women he was with that he was not interested in commitment and had a pool of other women available to meet his needs. He handled me differently, and I can see a progression of manipulation in the emails and voice mails he has left me over the weekend....which I have absolutely not responded to. But as of yesterday he was already back to responded to sleazy CL ads, so I believe it will turn out ok.
Kaylar - good point, and a lesson (yet again) learned. But I do not want a string of meaningless relationships, so it is back to the toys and hugging a pillow for me! I hope he learns a lesson here (but I doubt it); I have consistently let him know that my intuition would lead me to know if he was stumbling over his promise to me. He has stumbled, I am dumping him. Maybe he will stop and think twice about using and hurting women.....I am clicking my heels!
Thanks for your input. ~ Tori
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| bubblecropper |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 6:51 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 32
Total Posts: 1535
dublin
Ireland
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I‘m very confused...
At the start you were using each other for sex...no strings right? What changed?
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| kaylar |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 7:42 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 57
Total Posts: 430
kingston
Jamaica
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What happens is that we teach ourselves ‘patterns‘. We teach ourselves to react in certain ways...‘if he‘s in my bed he must be my husband‘...
Even though this is a guy whose physical description makes me queasy, and whose personality seems to have been deleted, you got the ‘husband‘ thing kind of twisted around the relationship.
Right now you need time to heal. You have to have virtually meaningless relationships with men you can‘t love so that you don‘t get into any rebound or desperation.
Just have a little bit more fun before you settle.
This guy is to be erased.
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| uberbeotch |
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Posted: 8/25/2009 11:15 AM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 489
Total Posts: 1257
In a Dark Castle
Belarus
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| WiserNow2 wrote: | | Guess what....it took about 10 mins. for him to write an email response that he hoped I changed my mind because we were so well matched sexually....and then was off on dating sites and answering CL ads within minutes of sending it! And here I thought I would rate at least one sleepless night by ending it.... |
That tells you EXACTLY what kind of person he is! A BIG FAT SLEAZE!!
Rest assured, it is not that you aren‘t worth pining over. He is probably a sex addict & he has to go find his fix somewhere else. He is incapable of actually FEELING anything or CARING about someone else, because he‘s too wrapped up in his own needs. F-ing CL troll!
You are much better off without him. Block his phone numbers & emails. Do not accept calls, texts, emails, or visits from him. Tell your work to not put his calls thru to you, and to turn him away if he shows up there.
Be sure to DELETE or THROW AWAY his email address, emails, phone numbers, photos, letters, etc. Get rid of anything from him or about him. Really - throw it all away & clear your space. You will feel a lot better.
Take some time off from dating to process what you‘ve just learned, because some important lessons were given.
Good for you!
UB
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| kaylar |
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Posted: 8/25/2009 3:34 PM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 57
Total Posts: 430
kingston
Jamaica
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I must tell you a now funny story. A chap had written me a rather poetic and quite enticing letter. I was provoked to write back and perhaps things would have been otherwise, but I found out he wrote the exact same letter to another woman.
As we get into patterns, so do men.
The Loser you were involved with writes the exact same thing, says and does the exact same thing with everyone.
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| blueghost |
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Posted: 8/28/2009 9:32 AM |
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Subject: Willl my womanizer let me go? |
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WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 34
Total Posts: 46
delta
Canada
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hi:)
From what i have read - you got what you wanted. A casual person to have sex with - someone who you could use for realsease - nothing heavy. So what‘s the problem? Personally - i would be offended if i were him. It seems that you just wanted casual and then started controlling if he could and could not talk or see other people. Was that even discussed? Perhpas you both had misguided expectations of one another - obviously the communication about the guidelines of your relationship were not agreed upon. I don‘t see him doing anything out of lines, unless you BOTH agreed that you would have casual sex with just one another. If not, then who he sees other than you is his business. If you don‘t want to be with him, then cut off communication with him. He will find someone else. Do you really like him? are you wanting something more serious - or did you? I am kind of confused on what you actualy wanted with him.
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