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  Posted: 12/1/2008 10:15 AM Subject: Recovering from Cyber Cheating
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Age: 45

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My husband and I have been married for over 20 years and have 3 children.  Last spring, he had an emotional affair with a woman he met playing the game Second Life.  As soon as I discovered it he ended the affair. After splitting up for two weeks, we decided that we both wanted to save our marriage and have been going to couples‘ counseling for several months.  While the counseling is improving our relationship and our communication a lot, it‘s not helping me deal with my pain.  I still have not completely forgiven him and don‘t know how to get to that point.  In his fantasy life, he pretended that I was dead and he was the Superdad, working, raising the kids, running the house and volunteering in our community, all on his own.  He claims that he didn‘t really love this woman, that he was just playing a game, like acting out a part in a play.  But when I found his conversation with her on our home computer, he called her his "wife" and said he loved her over and over.  It‘s so humiliating, knowing that I couldn‘t even compete with a cartoon!  I feel so degraded, it‘s almost worse than dealing with an actual, physical affair, in some ways.  Now I have no self confidence at all, I feel like I have to look impeccable all the time, even just to go to the grocery store!  I can‘t face the public for more than a couple of hours a day.  I‘m supposed to be searching for a new job, but the thought of having to face people in the workplace every day is too frightening!  How can I ever get my life back? 

Busty Superior
  Posted: 12/1/2008 7:16 PM Subject: Recovering from Cyber Cheating
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Age: 81

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I‘ve been in your shoes.  It‘s awful having the rug pulled out from under you.  You wonder who your spouse really is.  It‘s maddening.  Hang around, this place can be a wonderful release and huge group hug when you need it!

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