WomanSavers.com Forum / WOMEN'S ONLY FORUM / Has Anyone Noticed....

Hi!

I‘m new here (working on posting my story...but in a nutshell my husband just had an emotional affair...not physical about a year ago...finding it hard to forgive and forget though...) but anywho, in reading many of the posts on here, I noticed something that is in common with many of the other women.  It seems like they are less attractive than we are.  Just recently I found pictures of the other woman and was a tad surprised.  I don‘t mean to sound vain, and I doubt everyone else wants to either, but I am definately MUCH more attractive than she.  But then I think, well maybe I just think she‘s ugly because of what she did...I then showed the pics to my sister but she agreed with my thoughts as well...hehehe... 

With this information, I was wondering how do you women feel knowing that the other woman was less attractive?  I know for me it‘s a catch 22 in that I‘m immediately satiated knowing that I‘m a better looking person, but then I think, well what was it about her that made him like her and risk a marriage over her?  Was she that much a better person on the inside than I? 

Anyway, I would love to get others percpectives on this!  Look forward to hearing from you all!!

Shally, thank you for the welcome!!  I figure it is the ego stroke that makes it so appealing, doesn‘t make it any better but at least it‘s an answer to some of the wondering.  I guess when I found her photo I figured there would be an answer in the respect I would see she was gorgeous and it would be like BAM, so that‘s what he saw in her and drew him in!

By the way...I love your lawyer!  That‘s a great comment and really made me LOL!!

Anon...who says he wasn‘t getting any sex?  And did you ever think that maybe he was denying me when I wanted sex?  I appreciate your opinion...everyone has one, however before jumping to conclusions please read my entire post before making an opinion of your on.  I do believe I stated that it was an EMOTIONAL affair, not PHYSICAL...so sex was not an issue.  Thank you for being the first troll to reply to one of my posts! 

Hi Vlinder, first . Second ignore anon444 he/she is a troll and not a very good one at that.

My husband also had an EA. he still does not get that what he did was wrong. And he does not understand why I do not trust him as far as I could spit.

My husbands "friend" was/is prettier than I until she opens her mouth. Then all those looks go right down the gutter.

Some days it just hurt so damn much.

don‘t touch sore spots.

I‘ve heard this phrase before..  {excuse the language, but this is the way I heard it}  "Pussy has no face"  !!!!!

Momof4 wrote:

anon444 wrote: Maybe your husband wants something. You know what it is? sex. Maybe if u actually took care of his needs then you could actually keep a guy... heh... you with an obsession for manicures...   Look at it from our POV for once- we have needs too ya know... Sex. Hmmm. something that poor little anon never had, and has no prospects. Now, Anon444, get me my sammich, and I‘d like to have some iced tea. Green iced tea. Then I have a list for you. My kids need school supplies. I will leave the list at the mailbox, and you may pick it up and run along and buy what they need. I expect you‘ll use your own money for simply having the honor of shopping for my little crabs. You are a true lightweight.

Looks like this anon person pulled the post.  Gee, wonder why??

maybe regrets admitting being ugly and desparate?

I find it interesting that all of the married woman refer to the other woman as a whore, tramp etc.

I used to be in your shoes - married 9 1/2 years to a cheating, lying abusive spouse.  I got a divorce and have started dating again.

I used to feel the same way as all of you until I ended up dating a man who seemed so perfect - except for the fact that I found out he was married - living with his wife and child several months after I started dating him.

So, am I a tramp?  Of course not - the man lied to me.  He told me he was divorced.  He invited me to his home for dinner, to his community pool to swim w/ his kid and my children.  He invited me to his church.  He knew that I liked to keep my kids out of the relationship so if I met him in public with my kids in tow he was safe from worrying about public displays of affection in front of his neighbors and church family

You see - he was slick.  He would invite me when his wife was at work - or out of town.  He knew that I was a single mom of two little kids and that I don‘t have a lot of time to myself - therefore not a lot of time to check his story.

I found out he was married on my own - and ended it.  Apparently somewhere along the way his wife found out and started calling me - harrassing the hell out of me.  She cussed me - called me every name in the book and accused me of chasing her husband.  After I found out he was married and ended it - he continued to call me for over 7 MONTHS.  I did not pursue him further - and Ladies  - he is still calling.

So, I‘m sure my name is being drug through the mud - and friends have asked why I just didn‘t tell the wife what happened. 

Well, here‘s why.  When I read the posts from the married woman they are so fast to accuse the other woman.  They don‘t place the blame squarely with their spouse to whom they actually shared the vows of marriage with.  If I tell this woman what really went down - she will blame me and forgive him and in the process ruin my name in town even though I did nothing wrong...

Oh and as for looks - I am several years younger than his wife.  We look similar - hair color - eye color.  I am in much better physical shape, prettier and more accomplished professionally. Here is the thing though - I feel sorry for her.  I don‘t want to be the cause of a marriage break up and of her child being in a single parent family. 

I fell for her husband before I found out that he was married - so ending it was heartbreaking for me - and all I‘ve gotten from her is insults...mind you I know that he is a liar and I don‘t want someone in my life that I don‘t trust - nor do I want to be the other woman...

My ex‘s new girlfriend is ugly but much younger than me.  When I asked him, he told me 1) she could have children, 2) she was much younger, and 3) since she was "not as nice looking as what I‘d like", she wouldn‘t cheat on me.  Ironic, that he was the one cheating.....and I found out he‘s still looking for another woman.  The current girlfriend and my ex are getting married.....but he wants to have a "friend with benefits" on the side.....this he told me himself!

Go figure???

Hey, I thought it was great when my ex-husband‘s "other women" were none too special to look at!  I had a good laugh over that one!  My imagination was so much better than reality.

It forever lowered my respect for him. 

I have watched my roommate date different girls over the past couple of months.  He is a total hottie, and he flirted with me quite a lot when he first moved in.  There is, however, a 23 year age difference, and I decided that if I wanted to keep my roommate, it would be best to keep the relationship all business.  I told him that this way, it would never get awkward or weird between us, and we could be friends for life! 

Following that "rejection" he started dating skanky girls, and I do mean skanky!  Watching this has been better than TV, although I really worry about him.

I think what it boils down to is that the whore presents no challenge.  She is emotionally dependent on him.  She will screw his brains out on the first date.  There‘s no rejection.  Chances are, she isn‘t intellectually stimulating in any way, so of course, she isn‘t going to argue with him or express a difference of opinion.  She will follow him around and make him feel important. 

That describes the first week or two...

And then after he‘s gotten what he wants, he dumps her...

And then comes back to me and tells me the whole story.

Men can be really stuuuuuuuuupid.