So,you will tolerate this abuse from him to save your family.But what happens when that abuse is directed at your kids? It‘s really only a matter of time as they age they will talk back to him and he WILL not be able to handle that.And how can you think this isn‘t already effecting them?Will you leave then? I suggest that you take the test below and honestly take stock of your reactions to this and know that you are far from alone but that some women wise up and actually find a way out!
http://www.sexhelp.com/am-i-a-sex-addict/betrayal-bond-index
Please read this.You will recognize yourself in almost every page.
http://www.amazon.com/Betrayal-Bond-Breaking-Exploitive-Relationships/dp/1558745262
It‘s about love addiction too and that‘s why I stayed with my alcoholic,verbally abusive husband for over 24 years hoping that one day,he would STOP! He never did.So my only recourse was to split up my family and get divorced.
Had I not,I‘d never have known the self love and self respect that keeps me out of relationships with abusers!
Were you raised in an abusive environment?
I was and it is part of why it was normal to me.
Abuse is NOT normal.
My xH was raised by just the sort of man he became.
Disrespectful
Abusive
Unloving
Devoid of Empathy
Defensive
Blameshifting
Angry
Rude
Heartless
Oh so apologetic and claiming he would change,but couldn‘t as it was too engrained in him.
And in the end,I tolerated it because over the years,his abuse lowered my self worth to the point that I BELIEVED what he said to me.
Well..I am here to remind you.......
He is PROJECTING all his own sh*t onto you and your not supposed to sit that and take it to save your family.
YOU are hurting your kids by staying in that sort of abusive environment and one day,you son or daughter will grow up to be no different than you or your husband....if YOU don‘t change your reaction to him by standing up for yourself...........and ENDING THE ABUSE!
Try reading......Codependant NO More by Pia Melody too.And get yourself an individual therapist to help you work thru you low self esteem issues or you may never leave him for your own good and the good of your children!
If you don‘t consider your safety and happiness absolutely necessary,then you should stay and put up with every ounce of abuse he has to dish out and never consider yourself worthy of love,care or respect.