For me this is the problem with making abortion legal in a country. It makes it too easy for a man to say "well it‘s her choice, so it‘s her problem". Since the subject is so taboo, there is no real dialogue around the actuality of abortion. There is all this talk about philosophy, should you? shouldn‘t you? bla bla bla.
No-one talks about the physical reality. A fetus being literally ripped to shreds by an instrument that tears the child from a mother‘s womb. Don‘t kid yourself about a bundle of cells. A resident at a hospital told me he watched a video once, and you could see the baby‘s little hand being ripped apart. On ultrasound, you can see the baby opening its mouth in a silent scream as it is murdered.
But let‘s say none of that is true, as anyone who has had an experience with an abortion wants to believe. I am struck by how often doing the "right" thing when you are young leads to the "wrong" thing when you are older.
Adoption agencies are flooded with women who can no longer have children. No-one told them (and the abortion clinic certainly will not tell you) that multiple abortions increase the likelyhood that you will NEVER carry a baby to term. I have met women who had three, four abortions when they were younger, and the same women are complaining because now they‘re in their 30‘s, have a career, married to a great guy, want kids, and can‘t have them. They say things like "man the waiting list to adopt is so looooong". I wonder why.....maybe because of young girls like you were?
I know that medical care is very expensive in the states, and maybe that is why women choose abortion there. But here, it is free. So women have abortions even though their medical expenses would be covered throughout their entire pregnancies. Like many things in Canada, they have just watched too much American television and fail to realize that circumstances are different over there.
In this country, the statistical majority of women having abortions are in a financial position to raise the child. They just refuse to do so. The myth of the barren womb producing life-sustaining fruit in this society is ridiculous and I for one think it needs to be stopped.
Men need to admit that they came from a woman. A strong woman who went through hours of labour to bring you into the world. They need to show this process the respect it deserves, and stop convincing women to rip apart our bodies, telling us that our children are a mere nuissance, and downplaying the importance of mothers and motherhood. Abortion has just caused a society full of hatred and disrespect, and provided another way for men to control women. But choice?
I know of ten women who have had abortions. Eight were forced into the procedure, one of them threatened with a beating if she didn‘t go to the clinic instead. One was dragged in by her mother when she was 15 years old, crying, and they did the procedure anyway. One had her best friend (who was interested in her boyfriend) tell her her boyfriend was cheating and she should get rid of the baby because he would never support her. He was as much a victim as she was. Two of them came to Canada on "abortion vacations", an increasing trend. People come here from a country where abortion is illegal to have their babies murdered, usually because the baby has comitted the horrible criminal act of being a female fetus. But I suppose you would endorse that form of abortion. The two who were not forced, one was a hooker and the other was on her sixth abortion.
60% of abortions in this country are repeat abortions. Repeat, meaning third or greater.
The myth of the 16 year old rape victim we throw around to justify this is ridiculous, because 90% of rape victims do not have abortions. Usually it is too late by the time they find out...understandably injuries and trauma can make it difficult to notice a missed period. In addition, such a surgery can not be performed on someone who has been severely injured. Some are eight months pregnant before they admit it to themselves and some feel that they deserve to be pregnant, because they must have done something to deserve being raped. About 0.03% of abortions, at least in Canada, are performed on rape victims.
So honestly, I really don‘t buy the justifications people give for doing something like this. And obviously neither do you. You are speaking from a place of pain. You are angry at all women because one woman made a choice to murder your child and hurt you, and you were excluded from that choice. I have never met a male victim of abortion who did not feel this way, and start treating women like walking wombs.
And on this one point, I think you‘re damn right. Either a man should have a choice as to whether or not a woman has an abortion, or he should have the choice to divorce himself from any responsibility to the child. Frankly, I think he should have a choice regarding the abortion itself. If a man is willing to raise a child for the rest of his life, then some woman shouldn‘t be able to complain about the three or so months of discomfort that will be taken out of hers.
Abortion is a cold, cruel way of denying your mistakes. It is the worst kind of lie. I know a lot of people seem to love the idea, but the reality is horrifying. I wish more people were forced to look it right in the face, to meet the girls I have met, to see the crushed babies, and worst of all, the legislation.
In Canada, there is currently no legislation regarding abortion. The fetus is not considered a human being until it takes it‘s first breath outside the womb. Therefore, a person a) can not be legally charged for harming a fetus b) can murder their baby up until delivery, even while the child is coming up the birth canal. Oh how far we‘ve come. It really makes me sick.
I guess what makes me the sickest is the fact that when I was eighteen, i decided I didn‘t want children. I tried to have a tubal ligation and my doctor said I might want kids someday, so she refused to do it. Four other doctors refused to do it. Then I got pregnant, and my doctor immediately told me to have an abortion. I had my son, but I couldn‘t stop thinking: if I want to prevent myself from ever getting pregnant, it‘s not my body and it‘s not my choice. But if I want to murder the result of the pregnancy, then it‘s my body, then it‘s my choice.
Why is it only my choice when it‘s someone else‘s life I am snuffing out, rather than my own ability to have children?
I don‘t regret my children, but Iwounldn‘t have regretted that choice, and I know it.