WomanSavers.com Forum / MEN'S AREA / Dominant wife problem

Dude, wtf were you thinking?

Did I miss the part where this new lover was tested for std‘s?

I know everyones ideas of what is normal is different but I don‘t get it.  Why didn‘t you just buy her a dildo??

Your old wife is gone and so is the past life you had together.  This act is now forever ingrained on your futures.

So are you going to be the sissy maid from now on??  I suppose you will have to give her an ultimatum at this point.

I don‘t mind being the maid, I‘m even OK with the lover part and helping her prepare for her dates part its always been my fantasy. Its the exclusive to her new lover part I‘m not OK with and the change in her personality. Shes threatened me with exposure to my family and friends if i dont do EXACTLY as they say.

e and her have drawn up a whole set of rules I have to abide by

hhhmmmm, interesting.

Maybe you should fetch me a sammich then, that is, since you can‘t seem to remember where you left your man pants in the house.

Fantasy is one thing - reality is another. 

I think you have a problem on your hands.  I think you should both seriously reconsider this whole decision.  I think it may be too late now that your wife has experienced "open marriage."

I can‘t see any marriage surviving this for long.  I don‘t think it works.

I will admit I am in no place to advise you.

yes the problem here is that you are a closet dominant. and she has pulled the rug from right under you.  You thought you were in control of the situation and for a while it reads that you were, but youre not, and now if you dont like it, theres not a thing you can do to change it.. learn from this. if you want to play games you have to consider all the outcomes, and make sure they are covered.

question: since you were not invited to watch or be a part of the fantasy, how do u know it really took place?

perhaps its part of her game?

You got what you deserve for accepting this in your wife. You should dump her immediately dont matter how bad are the consequences. If she exposes you, well, her problem.

Anyway this story sounds very fake to me...

 I was hoping for some advice here, maybe I put it over wrong.

I‘m OK with my wife enjoying her lover, how can I not be? It‘s the change in her attitude to our situation that I‘m upset about. I just want my old wife back it‘s like I‘m dealing with a totaly different person. I didn‘t want to be cut off from our sex life completely. They mock and totally humilliate me and I‘m uncomfortable with it.

like i said earlier, you are upset because you lost control of the situation.  you had a plan and it didnt work out.  YOU are a closet dominant and youve chosen the wrong partner.

you will have to ride it out patiently.  it would help if you do not show your irrritation or upset. act like you dont care and find something else to entertain you in the meantime until this affair calms down a bit.

not everybody wants the traditional relationship. the pansymaid has made it clear he doesnt.  he cannot/will not satisfy his wife sexually and so they have come up with an arrangement.

giving advice that works for you and your life isnt always going to work for another. why dont u actually read what he is saying and asking for before judging him to be a fool. or at least set out the reasons why you think this situation is doomed. and before you go on a rant about her being a cheating whore, remember it was by consent of all parties. and infact set up by the pansymaid.

 I was actually hopping for some sympathetic replies on how to get my wife back to the way she was. I have no problem her seeing her lover it was just the horrible way she was treating me. However she has now finished with the aggressive guy, but, she has a new guy. New guy new problem. Wonder if you could advise guys.

My wife has now talked openly with a few friends about her last two lovers sighting my medical problems as the reason why she seeks sex else where. (I have no medical problem other than a small penis)

Her latest lover is an arrogant mixed race work colleague 10 yrs her junior at 32, whilst I have no objections about her going public, limitedly, I was shocked to find out she had told my own mother. It shouldn‘t have been a complete shock as they have always got on well. What did upset me a little though was last Saturday my mother took it upon herself to purchase an expensive lingerie set for my wife, for the enjoyment of my wife and her new lover. My mother giggled slightly after she had presented my wife with her gift and turned to me and said "you don‘t mind do you?"

I was shocked at the ease at which my mother had decided to embarrass me so easily. What do others think is this a humiliation to far?

"I was actually hopping for some sympathetic replies on how to get my wife back to the way she was."

Do as I said before. Dump this wife and get another one.

"I have no problem her seeing her lover it was just the horrible way she was treating me."

Then you have a problem in your head.

"However she has now finished with the aggressive guy, but, she has a new guy. New guy new problem. Wonder if you could advise guys."

The problem is with you. Don‘t you get it ? Get rid of this woman now. It seems that your woman is quite fast on geting new  lovers. You know how do we call women like that ? Here is a hint, listen to this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R1g1I1wNKkQ

"My wife has now talked openly with a few friends about her last two lovers sighting my medical problems as the reason why she seeks sex else where. (I have no medical problem other than a small penis)"

I don‘t think anyone here is interested in details of the size of your dick, but your biggest problem seems to be the size of your brain, cause it‘s what put you in this situation.

"Her latest lover is an arrogant mixed race work colleague 10 yrs her junior at 32, whilst I have no objections about her going public, limitedly, I was shocked to find out she had told my own mother. It shouldn‘t have been a complete shock as they have always got on well. What did upset me a little though was last Saturday my mother took it upon herself to purchase an expensive lingerie set for my wife, for the enjoyment of my wife and her new lover. My mother giggled slightly after she had presented my wife with her gift and turned to me and said "you don‘t mind do you?"
I was shocked at the ease at which my mother had decided to embarrass me so easily. What do others think is this a humiliation to far?"

Honestly, I think you are a troll and I don‘t believe in mostly about what it‘s written here, but if it‘s true, I feel no shame in "embarrass" you, and I don‘t even know you that well, so it‘s no surprise that your mother do the thing.

If I get a warning or be banned for this post, I don‘t care, but if have anything in your brain, follow my advice. Dump your wife.

My goodness, it‘s been a long time since I‘ve been witness to grief like that.  (I lived in an orphanage with unstable children for a couple years and was heavily involved in psychology and holistic medicine.)

If this stuff is true, I believe you are in a state of mental disease.  And at your age, I imagine it is going to be unimaginably difficult to undo the damage to your psyche. 

You‘re aroused at the thought of subservience.  Most men in that circumstance would have left long ago, instinctually.  You on the other hand seem to barely notice the toxicity at all, as though you‘ve been stewing in it all your life, perceiving it as normal. 

It seems as though you have a pretty unhealthy relationship with your mother too.  It likely the reason why you married the woman you did.  She behaved that way with no shame and your mother implicitly encourages her to do this, all at your expense.

It‘s amazing.  I really hope, if there is such a thing as reincarnation, you have the opportunity to try again, to not make the same unimaginable mistakes.  In this life though, I can‘t see you recovering fully.

But I‘m sure, dumping both your wife AND your mother will be the first step in healing.

Un-frickin‘-believable...