WomanSavers.com Forum / MEN'S AREA / What can I do?

I have recently caught my wife chating online with a truck driver from her work. She said it was nothing, So I asked  her to tell him she was married in an eamail. I trusted that would be the end of it, it wasn‘t.

  When I read her mail the next day, she had told him she was married and said she hadn‘t told him b4 because she didn‘t want to scare him off. He replies that was ok if she was married, then it got pretty dirty. I sent him a very direct to the point email and got his address. But since this has started she is wearing make up to work, curling her hair and alot of other things. She has since stabbed me and told me she hates me for catching her. I would go but there is no place elese to go at the moment. We have children and I won‘t leave them with her. Not if she is going to have pervs around. If any one ever hurt my kids I would wind up in prison for my reaction.

  She is now blamming me for the fact that she has to go to court for domestic violence and get counceling. When I ask her to look at it from my point of veiw she laughs. And is now claiming I am paranoid... After every thing thats going on, im at a loss. That is why I am posting here, can any one help?

She stabbed you and she is not in jail?  A spouse who is cheating always turns the blame on their husband/wife.  Take your children and leave immediately!  Call a woman’s shelter if you need advice.  I am sure they will be glad to help you.  Remember, abuse affects your children as well.  If anything, do it for your children.

I was thinking the same; put HER out.  You and the kids stay.  She‘s dangerous, in more ways than one. 

I‘m sorry this happened to you.

  I thank all of you for your comments. This is a really bad situation. I really can‘t do much with out having a place go. I get the fact that I can not fix this, no matter how badly wish to.

  If only there was a way to make us a happy family again. I would do anything to accomplish that. I have never been abusive or controling and my kids adore me.... Does any one think that the counseling she has to take may help? Because if there is the slightest chance of saving our family, I am willing to try. She hasn‘t always been like this, I don‘t know what happened. Is there such a thing as a midlife crisis, really?

she stabs you and blames you for having to go to court?  LMFAO.

And since the cheating wh0re is laughing at you, start making plans to divorce her.  Hell, I‘d advise divorce if she wasn‘t even that blatanly evil.

I know you want to stay for your kids, but trust me as a man that divorced his wife, that is the wrong reason to stay.

And if you do stay with a cheater with no remorse and downright contempt for you because of the kids, then you will have to settle for being the husband of a hussbag and become a cuckold.

Trust me, you need to get a lawyer and soon.  If she stabbed you, you should be able to get your kids rather easily.  No judge in his/her right mind would let children be with someone that attempted murder, let alone violence with a deadly weapon.

This should be a slam dunk in getting your kids and since her domestic violence has already been a matter of record and she is going to court for it, should be easy.

No.  She will go (maybe) because she has to, but chances are she will not learn a thing.  Remember, it is your fault she has to go to these classes.  That is her thinking.  In her mind, she did nothing wrong.

Hello - late in the party coming to this one.

You don‘t have to leave at all.  You can go to court, get a protection order, and have her forcibly removed from the home.  While you‘re at it, file for divorce, ask for full custody of the kids, and have her served.  Trust me - you have a lot more power than you think you do.  I am guessing that if she got in trouble with the DV you have taken some kind of action?

Besides, if you have the kids, you will need the house.

Stabbing is quite a lot worse than hitting.  Deadly weapons are even more serious than slapping or fists.  I assume you have taken pictures?  You will need them for court. 

You don‘t have to put up with it.  I don‘t know what your financial situation is, but I think you can probably handle things just fine without her.

Has she always been violent, or is this new?  She could potentially be court ordered into batterers treatment counseling, anger management, have supervised visitation of the kids, and have to pay child support...

How old are your children?

She‘s stabbed you...ok so you survuved, but what happens if she loses her temper with the kids? If I were you I‘d be making tracks with the kids and I‘d be insisting she goes and gets some help before even considering making the relationship work. first things first, get safe and get your kids safe.

I‘m extremely hesitant about encouraging you to try to make this work...if you were a woman who‘s husband had stabbed you I‘d have no hesitation in telling you to get some sense and get the hell out, leave her to her own devices....but you seem to want this to work...you don‘t seem to have realised the seriousness of what she has done? I don‘t think a few sessions of counselling will be enough here....I think it will be a long drawn out affair to get this woman to realise what kind of person she has become, and I don‘t think its fair on your children to have them go through this process with her.