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    WomanSavers.com Forum / INSPIRATION FOR WOMEN / I finally did it... need reassurance tho =(

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TALUTAH
  Posted: 8/11/2009 12:30 PM Subject: I finally did it... need reassurance tho =(
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undecided723 wrote:
I‘m 37 years old and I found out my husband was cheating on me over four months ago. I tried continuously to have him just stop and I would forgive. He says he still loves me.. And I‘ve been overlooking his lies on occassion to avoid conflict.. But Today he came out with another lie to go see her so I told him I could not do it anymore and if he wasn‘t going to stop then he could take his crap with him. We argued and he SAYS he wasn‘t going there (but I‘m not dumb) And I made him pack a bag and leave. I was so angry at the time, It didn‘t bother me.  Now several hours later, I‘m home alone and crying and just wishing he would just come home. I haven‘t broken down and texted him or called him yet and I‘m hoping I can be strong and not do it. But I‘m worried that I will have nobody without him..  I haven‘t told my friends because I‘ve been too embarrased, my mother knows and has been supportive. But I have no children and just feel so alone.. I feel like I could never live without him. Due to financial circumstances, I will lose the house if we seperate because I cannot afford it alone. Someone please shed some light for me. I could use it. Thanks.



Hello, welcome,

First stop crying!

Change the locks, do not call, do not even try to contact him.

He is nothing but a liar and a cheater.Be glad he is gone.

Be glad you two do NOT have any children, it would be worse if you did.

Why do you feel like you cannot live without him?

Do not ever give any one that much power over you.

You simply cannot depend on others to make you happy, make your own happiness.

Call one or two of your friends that you trust.Talk to them.
Do you work outside the home? Either way you need to talk to a lawyer, preferably a female. Do it right away.

As for your home, the lawyer can advise you on that also.
Some time losing the house is better than keeping it with a lying cheater in it!

Good luck,
Be strong,

T.




Kitty Kitty
  Posted: 8/11/2009 1:59 PM Subject: I finally did it... need reassurance tho =(
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undecided723 wrote:
I‘m 37 years old and I found out my husband was cheating on me over four months ago. I tried continuously to have him just stop and I would forgive. He says he still loves me.. And I‘ve been overlooking his lies on occassion to avoid conflict.. But Today he came out with another lie to go see her so I told him I could not do it anymore and if he wasn‘t going to stop then he could take his crap with him. We argued and he SAYS he wasn‘t going there (but I‘m not dumb) And I made him pack a bag and leave. I was so angry at the time, It didn‘t bother me.  Now several hours later, I‘m home alone and crying and just wishing he would just come home. I haven‘t broken down and texted him or called him yet and I‘m hoping I can be strong and not do it. But I‘m worried that I will have nobody without him..  I haven‘t told my friends because I‘ve been too embarrased, my mother knows and has been supportive. But I have no children and just feel so alone.. I feel like I could never live without him. Due to financial circumstances, I will lose the house if we seperate because I cannot afford it alone. Someone please shed some light for me. I could use it. Thanks.


It sounds like you gave him more than a chance to stop, and clean up his act and he chose not to.

From what you‘ve told us you definately did the right thing..You do not deserve to be lied to, manipulated and cheated on.

Don‘t you dare be embarrassed by his actions...Your friends will know know that he‘s the one to be embarrassed...not you! You were faithful and even patient enough to give him a chance!!! He should be holding his head down like a dirty dog...Not you.

I agree with T. You should look into an attorney to make sure even if you can‘t get the house you leave with enough to get back on your feet...

Be glad you didn‘t have kids with him at this point...They would be hurt and affected by this...and tie you to him...Now if you separate from him you can have zero ties if that‘s what you choose.

I‘m really sorry you‘re going through this...and I know you can get through it...

And YES YES YES YES...You did the right thing.

 



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