WomanSavers.com Forum / GENERAL / Oh Star...........I got you a present.......

I agree that is one way to look at it, he is so insecure....

But another way to look at it is, that he is so "secure" in his relationship with her, that he knows, no matter who she has sex with, she will always come back to him and remain as a couple.  He feels confident that he satisifys her every need.  Even the need for her to have sex with others, if she pleases.

From what I have been reading here on threads, there appears to be many couples with no morals, so I say let them have their fun, who really cares? 

DD

Thank you DD, you took the words right out of my mouth. At least you get it. Although I object to you saying that I have no morals. I have plenty of morals. They are just not your morals. What morals are you talking about? The ones in the Bible? Please, this is the 21st century. We must get over that.

I see myself as violating no law of nature or the universe. As such, I‘m a very moral man. We just disagree about what is moral and what is not.

Sunny - Yes I‘m sure you can‘t see it. You say it goes against everything you‘ve been taught. In other words, the reason you can‘t see it is because others have told you not to see it. If you agree with the morality of the society that has shaped you, that‘s one thing. But to say that something is right or wrong only because 51 percent of people have told you that it is, your parents, or some men in black robes thousands of years ago is precisely what makes you a non-thinking sheep. Instead of telling me what you were taught by others, start telling me what you have taught to yourself. Become an independent thinker with your own values, irrespective of whether or not those values coincide with your parent‘s or the majority‘s values. I get my values from what I believe to be the laws of nature as they are revealed to me. That is what I see as objective truth. If you open your eyes to see how the sexual dynamic between men and women is really setup by nature to work, you‘ll throw your Bible in the trash.

Starr - STDs are very rare in the heterosexual community. The illusion that they are common is just a tool used by the culture to control your behavior to suit it. In other words, that fear based nonsense is just a religious tool to keep you under control. If you are heterosexual, drug free, and not a prostitute, or have never been with a prostitiute, and use condoms/birth control, your chances of catching an STD are slim to none. Anyone telling you differently has an anti-sex agenda. Cut the disempowering fear based crap out! Break the fear based chains of your own slavery to this culture and LIVE!!!  

Thank you DD, you took the words right out of my mouth. At least you get it. Although I object to you saying that I have no morals. I have plenty of morals. They are just not your morals. What morals are you talking about? The ones in the Bible? Please, this is the 21st century. We must get over that.

I see myself as violating no law of nature or the universe. As such, I‘m a very moral man. We just disagree about what is moral and what is not.

Sunny - Yes I‘m sure you can‘t see it. You say it goes against everything you‘ve been taught. In other words, the reason you can‘t see it is because others have told you not to see it. If you agree with the morality of the society that has shaped you, that‘s one thing. But to say that something is right or wrong only because 51 percent of people have told you that it is, your parents, or some men in black robes thousands of years ago is precisely what makes you a non-thinking sheep. Instead of telling me what you were taught by others, start telling me what you have taught to yourself. Become an independent thinker with your own values, irrespective of whether or not those values coincide with your parent‘s or the majority‘s values. I get my values from what I believe to be the laws of nature as they are revealed to me. That is what I see as objective truth. If you open your eyes to see how the sexual dynamic between men and women is really setup by nature to work, you‘ll throw your Bible in the trash.

Starr - STDs are very rare in the heterosexual community. The illusion that they are common is just a tool used by the culture to control your behavior to suit it. In other words, that fear based nonsense is just a religious tool to keep you under control. If you are heterosexual, drug free, and not a prostitute, or have never been with a prostitiute, and use condoms/birth control, your chances of catching an STD are slim to none. Anyone telling you differently has an anti-sex agenda. Cut the disempowering fear based crap out! Break the fear based chains of your own slavery to this culture and LIVE!!!  

unpopular truth...you come and post and spend more time talking about sex than the time it takes to even have it.

your posts are very disturbing because not only are they mostly about sex...they are also very aggressive. i dont know if you ever even knew why this site is even here. this site is called womansavers and it is for abused women.

when i was 15 i was babysitting and when the single father came home i could tell he had been drinking but i thought he was an adult and if he wanted to drink it was fine. i just wanted to get paid and go home. i had all my homework done and i had even tried to figure out math problems that we were going study. he raped me that night in the bathroom.

i didnt tell anyone because not only did i somehow think it was my fault but something inside me was happening that was changing my life. there was like this growing stain on my soul that no matter how many showers i took...would not wash off. even the blankets i had on my bed felt course and not the same comfy blankets they used to be.

by the time i graduated from high school for some reason the guys that were attracted to me were very aggressive...controlling and demanding. i was just a nothing that served for their pleasure.

at 20...i didnt know it but looking back i just wanted to die and started losing weight and couldnt keep food down. so i stopped eating food because it just made me throw up. my body was eating itself! i ended up in the hospital being fed threw my viens.

unpopular truth...that is just my story and each woman here has a story. by the way...did you know that over 60% of women have been sexually assaulted or molested.

i would like to plead with you to not be so cavalier with your attitude and beliefs that you come to an abused woman‘s site and push your aggressive point of view and sexual ideas.

until you have walked a mile in our shoes you dont even deserve to voice your opinions like you have. yes we can be harsh on each other here and parse each sentence but please forgive us for we are not men and we dont share your view of the world.

when you talk here...please be mindful of your audience.

unpopular truth...you come and post and spend more time talking about sex than the time it takes to even have it.

your posts are very disturbing because not only are they mostly about sex...they are also very aggressive. i dont know if you ever even knew why this site is even here. this site is called womansavers and it is for abused women.

when i was 15 i was babysitting and when the single father came home i could tell he had been drinking but i thought he was an adult and if he wanted to drink it was fine. i just wanted to get paid and go home. i had all my homework done and i had even tried to figure out math problems that we were going study. he raped me that night in the bathroom.

i didnt tell anyone because not only did i somehow think it was my fault but something inside me was happening that was changing my life. there was like this growing stain on my soul that no matter how many showers i took...would not wash off. even the blankets i had on my bed felt course and not the same comfy blankets they used to be.

by the time i graduated from high school for some reason the guys that were attracted to me were very aggressive...controlling and demanding. i was just a nothing that served for their pleasure.

at 20...i didnt know it but looking back i just wanted to die and started losing weight and couldnt keep food down. so i stopped eating food because it just made me throw up. my body was eating itself! i ended up in the hospital being fed threw my viens.

unpopular truth...that is just my story and each woman here has a story. by the way...did you know that over 60% of women have been sexually assaulted or molested.

i would like to plead with you to not be so cavalier with your attitude and beliefs that you come to an abused woman‘s site and push your aggressive point of view and sexual ideas.

until you have walked a mile in our shoes you dont even deserve to voice your opinions like you have. yes we can be harsh on each other here and parse each sentence but please forgive us for we are not men and we dont share your view of the world.

when you talk here...please be mindful of your audience.

unpopular truth...you come and post and spend more time talking about sex than the time it takes to even have it.

your posts are very disturbing because not only are they mostly about sex...they are also very aggressive. i dont know if you ever even knew why this site is even here. this site is called womansavers and it is for abused women.

when i was 15 i was babysitting and when the single father came home i could tell he had been drinking but i thought he was an adult and if he wanted to drink it was fine. i just wanted to get paid and go home. i had all my homework done and i had even tried to figure out math problems that we were going study. he raped me that night in the bathroom.

i didnt tell anyone because not only did i somehow think it was my fault but something inside me was happening that was changing my life. there was like this growing stain on my soul that no matter how many showers i took...would not wash off. even the blankets i had on my bed felt course and not the same comfy blankets they used to be.

by the time i graduated from high school for some reason the guys that were attracted to me were very aggressive...controlling and demanding. i was just a nothing that served for their pleasure.

at 20...i didnt know it but looking back i just wanted to die and started losing weight and couldnt keep food down. so i stopped eating food because it just made me throw up. my body was eating itself! i ended up in the hospital being fed threw my viens.

unpopular truth...that is just my story and each woman here has a story. by the way...did you know that over 60% of women have been sexually assaulted or molested.

i would like to plead with you to not be so cavalier with your attitude and beliefs that you come to an abused woman‘s site and push your aggressive point of view and sexual ideas.

until you have walked a mile in our shoes you dont even deserve to voice your opinions like you have. yes we can be harsh on each other here and parse each sentence but please forgive us for we are not men and we dont share your view of the world.

when you talk here...please be mindful of your audience.

Please think about it and PM me if you ever need to talk or receive clarification on anything. I am at your service.   

Shelbelle - First let me say that I was greatly shocked and saddened to read your story. What happened to you was an unforgivable crime against you and against nature. I am tremendously sorry that you had to experience such disempowerment and helplessness as the core of your very womanhood was shaken to its foundation. You have my sincerest and most profound sympathies. If in fact the rape involved physical force (not that statutory BS) it is my opinion that this man deserves the death penalty, or at least castration.

That being said, however, I resent the implication that my "aggressive" sexual lifestyle can even be used in the same sentence as that. If that is what you believe than you completely misunderstood me. You see, I don‘t preach the same type of "aggression" that you experienced at the hands of men that just wanted to use you like a lifeless object while you just lay there and go somewhere else in your head. That type of aggression is very foreign to me. In fact, it is the exact opposite of what I teach and what I‘ve experienced in my own sex life.

I personally can‘t get turned on by a woman who‘s not enjoying herself as much (preferably more so) than I am. What I want is for women to precisely take their sexual power back and become the aggressors themselves. I‘m assuming that this feeling of power, liberation, and a true sense of owning yourself and enjoying every minute of it, is the exact opposite of what you felt when that monster was on top of you. As such, the feelings and emotions that I am trying to inspire in women are the opposite of the "aggression" that you are talking about. I want women to own themselves, regardless of peer pressure, and take back their sexual power, even to the point of being sexually aggressive with men - the exact opposite of the circumstances that you‘re describing. As such, please don‘t compare my "aggression" to that of your rapist. I can‘t tell you how unfair that is.     

Believe it or not, however, your message did not fall on deaf ears. If what you say is true, in that most of the women here have been sexually abused, than I finally understand the extremely sexually conservative attitudes that they have.

On my 18th birthday, I had sex with a girl who was sexually molested by her uncle as a child. I didn‘t know it at the time but after she told me, it explained why during sex with me, she just went somewhere else in her head until it was over. I never had a girl that was so unenthusiastic. Her morals were also very conservative due to her horrible experiences.

Now I think things are clearer for me. You women here associate sex with something tremendously ugly; with a sense of disempowerment and helplessness, unless you trust the man absolutely, which translates into you having to be in love with him etc... Thank you for clearing that up for me.

But you see, your emotional healing will never come from therapists, support groups that dwell on the negative, or any other politically correct source. Your emotional healing will only come from one place - YOU OWNING YOURSELF AND EMPOWERING YOURSELF TO TURN INTO A SOURCE OF JOY WHAT YOUR RAPIST TRIED TO TURN INTO A SOURCE OF MISERY!

That is the only thing that will truly heal you - my type of "aggression;" female aggression which does have a componant of sexual liberation in it. Bury your past, don‘t let it own you, or shape your attitudes against sex, the way it seems to have shaped the rest of these women, whose anti-sex attitudes seem to be based on a trembling fear.

You see Shelbelle, you seem to equate sexual liberation with male aggression and female helplessness and disempowerment. I‘m trying to teach the EXACT OPPOSITE! Aggression can be a form of empowerment and liberation and I think you, of all the women here, need to try it, for the sake of your own power and future happiness. Instead of remembering and mourning the loss of your strength and dignity, aggressively rise up and take it back. You can be just as sexually aggressive as any sexually liberated man and you can use the same thing - sex - to empower yourself and restore your dignity and self worth that your rapist used to take it away from you. In this is your hope Shelbelle, and in this is your salvation. 

Once again, thank you for clearing things up for me. Now I understand the prudish nature of this site and its disempowered causes. All the more reason to empower yourselves. I will definitely modify my message accordingly. Sex doesn‘t have to be ugly and rooted in power. It can be an expression of beauty and a transferance of spiritual energy. I‘m sure you‘re a beautiful woman Shelbelle and I hope you realize that sex doesn‘t have to be ugly - it can be a source of tremendous beauty and empowerment against your terrible past.

Please think about it and PM me if you ever need to talk or receive clarification on anything. I am at your service.   

Why do you feel the need to insist there is something worng with women who prefer one man?