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| alwaystrue |
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Posted: 7/23/2008 11:16 AM |
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Subject: Push on through? |
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New WomanSaver
Female Member
Age: 40
Total Posts: 1
Waco
Texas
United States
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I‘ve been married for 33 years, and while it‘s not been perfect, there are more good memories than bad, and I love my husband dearly. Last year he cheated on me--in fact he had online and phone relationships with at least a couple of women, and sex with one that I know of. I caught him, threw him out, and he said he‘d been depressed (that much is true) and confused, but said knew then that he wanted to come back and make a good marriage again. I took him right back and I thought things were ok. So....now I find out that he‘s had a cell phone account with someone else for three months. Claims it belongs to an employee, and he was just helping the guy out. I don‘t think so for several reasons. We‘ve had several confrontations about this over the last couple of weeks, and he‘s neither admitted to an affair, nor given the phones up for me to see as I‘ve asked. He just says, "I don‘t know where the phones are." There have been 616 minutes used on them (same on both) in the last two weeks, and always when I‘m not around. We‘re supposed to visit a marriage counselor in two days, but who knows if he‘ll go at all. He just wants me to be lovey, as he‘s being now, and back up to where there was no problem. I might have done that, but I know that they‘re still talking. I‘m just pretending I don‘t know. Of course, he still claims it‘s not him. I want to believe there‘s hope that this can work out...do you know of any long marriages like mine that have had this challenge and made it through to better times? Or am I just being a chump?
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| supermom21664 |
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Posted: 7/23/2008 8:30 PM |
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Subject: Push on through? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 54
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Total Posts: 1116
Greenbeau
Alabama
United States
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Hi always, yes there are marriages out there that have survived infidelity and some of them are stronger. I would be unesy with the fact that it seems to be happening a second time. The cell phones sre VERY suspicious! If you have the whole number you can go to yahoo people search and put the number in and do a search on it. If is a landline with a published number it should give you a name. I would continue to keep up the act and go to counseling and see how he acts. He would al so get an ultimatim.. produce those 2 phones or face the wrath.
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| oldwiz |
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Posted: 7/24/2008 8:46 PM |
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Subject: Push on through? |
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WomanSaver Addict
Male Member
Age: 62
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Total Posts: 230
Anywhere But
California
United States
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You‘re not being a chump. You‘re being hopeful. Meanwhile, he‘s full of crap. It all boils down to what your tolerance level is for hs lies, his cheating and above and beyond all else, the insult of his believing that you‘re so ignorant, unintelligent and gullible that you can‘t figure out what he‘s up to and/or don‘t care.
As for the rest, I was married a mere 27 years and divorced her the second time I figured it out!
PS. I hope you‘re at least in your 50s or you were a wee bit of a child bride, like 7.
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| sandrabrown |
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Posted: 7/28/2008 7:43 AM |
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Subject: Push on through? |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 49
Total Posts: 537
Penrose
North Carolina
United States
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I would certainly have red flags about this. The burden of redemption in the marriage is in his court and this isn‘t an effective way of rebuilding trust. Tell him what you need in order to move forward.
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