| AUTHOR |
MESSAGE
|
| karin1957 |
 |
|
Posted: 3/21/2010 7:53 AM |
 |
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 50
Total Posts: 17
Raeford
North Carolina
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
 Send Note
|
| malarkey marie wrote: |
| karin1957 wrote: |
| moogleangelgirl wrote: |
| Rhiannon wrote: |
|
There are questions that you should be asking an attorney. Find a good divorce lawyer, and fire these questions there. I don‘t know how it works if you are not a US citizen. I would get legal advice before making any decisions.
In most states, yes, a husband can legally kick you out of the house. All it takes is an ex parte restraining order. It largely depends on which state you live in, what the laws are in that state, but again, how the law applies if you are not a US citizen. Whatever you do - do not let your husband know that you are worried about this. Keep your mouth shut and say nothing until you have all the facts.
Know all of your rights before you do anything.
I am sorry you are going through this. It sounds very disconcerting and scary. Please continue to post. And see a lawyer. |
"Note that in divorce settlements and custody battles, a judge may want to hear both sides of the dispute before an ex parte restraining order is issued." quote from the link below:
http://www.ehow.com/how_2140122_file-ex-parte-restraining-order.html
She still has rights, he has to have cause such as threat or harassment.
It‘s not as easy as it looks, I tried kicking my ex out before. Wasn‘t too easy with my word against his and this was before the abuse started. Then again that was many years ago, i havent heard of this kind or R-order. I hope for her sake the judge would decide to hear her side. I doubt he would make her leave, having nowhere to go and being from another country with a child living here.
|
Thanks i will check this out . And i‘m stilling waiting of the phone call from the lawyer.
And by the way my husband told on the weekend that i must to my job around the that i can stay her. Is this something. It hurts but i try to hanging in there. |
the husband that suggests the wife earn income or more income is setting her up to look as tho she won‘t need his money in a divorce or that she will need less child support.
he could be planning to keep the boy and get money from you. allthewhile, taunting you and making you dance to his tune.
SEE A LAWYER. |
I say a lawyer and there say there can help me but i need 2500 Dollar what i dont have. What i do know yesterday i found a letter and that says he open a loan. I think he got that loan for do pay his lawyer. Do you got some other advice for me. Thanks
|
| karin1957 |
|
|
Posted: 3/25/2010 5:32 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 50
Total Posts: 17
Raeford
North Carolina
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
| irishtoo wrote: | | Hi karin, have you found anything out yet. Just wondering how you are. |
No i still looking for a free lawyer, but i‘m hanging in there
|
| sagewy |
|
|
Posted: 4/16/2010 8:51 PM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Addict
Female Member
Age: 36
.gif)
Total Posts: 215
clovis
New Mexico
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
Karin, you need legal aid ASAP. You file a restraining order NOW keeping him from your house. They are planning to take your son. They cannot unless you let them. They think since you lived in Germany they can get him. RUN to a woman‘s shelter and get advice.
File for sole custody immediately and divorce. IF you think they are going to take your son, go home to Germany NOW before they file a restraining order or temp order keeping you from taking him. Pack all your crap in a storage facility. NEver talk to your husband at all. Act like your willing to work it out. You will need to surprise him. If you own the house, just make him sell it. I have some other advice in private.
|
| sagewy |
|
|
Posted: 4/16/2010 8:54 PM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Addict
Female Member
Age: 36
Total Posts: 215
clovis
New Mexico
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
Remember he is emotionally abusing you with threats and its assault. Document it at the court house by getting a restraining order against him. Tell the court he is threatening to take your son, has the sister calling and is threatening to throw you out. You need help from a woman‘s abuse shelter now. You will need their support in court and their contacts.
|
| Rhiannon |
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2010 11:15 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 0
.gif)
Total Posts: 3518
Lacey
Washington
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
Is there any way you can go back to Germany? And take your son with you, without his knowing? Could you file for divorce as a German citizen? If you were over there with your son, possession is 9/10 of the law, and you‘d be at a distinct advantage.
Do you have family who could help you? Who could purchase the tickets for you? Then all you would need to do is grab your passports, and board a plane with your child. I would consider going home to your family of origin, where language and legal barriers are a non-issue. It would disempower your husband in a really big way.
If you are not a US citizen, it creates all kinds of problems as far as finding work, and legal representation. Most Legal Aid facilities do not handle divorces and family law, and $2500 sounds like the retainer - not the cost of the actual divorce. The retainer, alone, could be exhausted within the first month, and most attorneys will drop you if you cannot afford to pay the legal fees. If you have to bring in interpreters and services like that, expect the legal bills to be sky high, and what‘s more scary, is that it could bankrupt you, and/or you could lose.
I think I would flee the country with the child. If no divorce has been filed, it isn‘t child kidnapping. If anyone raised the issue, you could call it a "vacation." Do it before any legal actions are filed.
Do you have family who could help? I think they would if they knew how desperate the situation is.
|
| karin1957 |
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2010 11:37 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 50
Total Posts: 17
Raeford
North Carolina
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
| sagewy wrote: | Karin, you need legal aid ASAP. You file a restraining order NOW keeping him from your house. They are planning to take your son. They cannot unless you let them. They think since you lived in Germany they can get him. RUN to a woman‘s shelter and get advice.
File for sole custody immediately and divorce. IF you think they are going to take your son, go home to Germany NOW before they file a restraining order or temp order keeping you from taking him. Pack all your crap in a storage facility. NEver talk to your husband at all. Act like your willing to work it out. You will need to surprise him. If you own the house, just make him sell it. I have some other advice in private. |
I talked to legal aid but there say there cant help me. there say i‘m not a american. And the woman shelter don‘t take we only wen he would hit me. to germany i can go i still need a passport for my son but i can make it no money and if he must undersign the papers. to germany i cant go the german embassy told me than he can ge me with kiddnapping and the lawer was telling me that too.
|
| karin1957 |
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2010 11:43 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 50
Total Posts: 17
Raeford
North Carolina
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
| Rhiannon wrote: | Is there any way you can go back to Germany? And take your son with you, without his knowing? Could you file for divorce as a German citizen? If you were over there with your son, possession is 9/10 of the law, and you‘d be at a distinct advantage.
Do you have family who could help you? Who could purchase the tickets for you? Then all you would need to do is grab your passports, and board a plane with your child. I would consider going home to your family of origin, where language and legal barriers are a non-issue. It would disempower your husband in a really big way.
If you are not a US citizen, it creates all kinds of problems as far as finding work, and legal representation. Most Legal Aid facilities do not handle divorces and family law, and $2500 sounds like the retainer - not the cost of the actual divorce. The retainer, alone, could be exhausted within the first month, and most attorneys will drop you if you cannot afford to pay the legal fees. If you have to bring in interpreters and services like that, expect the legal bills to be sky high, and what‘s more scary, is that it could bankrupt you, and/or you could lose.
I think I would flee the country with the child. If no divorce has been filed, it isn‘t child kidnapping. If anyone raised the issue, you could call it a "vacation." Do it before any legal actions are filed.
Do you have family who could help? I think they would if they knew how desperate the situation is. |
lawer says is kiddnapping when i leave and the german embassy too. i don‘t know nothing else where to go. Like i said the legal aid dont help me eather. there say i‘m not a american citizen.
My family would help me i know that.
but i must find out how i can do it without letting him know that i make a passport for my son. May you got some advice. thanks for writing me .
i know i would get help for a divorce in germany but i dont know how i can get there without getting charge for kiddnapping.
Right know looks not so good. but i try to hanging in there for my son.
|
| Rhiannon |
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2010 6:23 PM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 0
Total Posts: 3518
Lacey
Washington
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
It is child kidnapping if a divorce has been filed, the papers have been signed by a judge, and you have been served. It is not kidnapping, however, for you to go "on vacation" with your child, and as his mother, you are certainly the "custodial" parent. If no divorce has been filed, who can prevent you from traveling - and taking your child with you? To go home to visit long distance relatives?
If the divorce has been filed, the papers will prohibit you from taking your child out of state, and out of the country. I think you need to beat him to the punch. If you do it before he has you served, then the onus will be on him to deal with German law, and the child will be in your custody.
I know you are frightened, but I am far more concerned for you where you are not a US citizen. And if you are financially dependent on him, and he has you served, and you are not in a position to afford legal counsel??? I fear for your safety, and I also fear for your legal rights. Mostly, I am concerned about you losing your child. I can tell you that men like this don‘t play fair and are not concerned about your personal rights.
I don‘t normally give advice like this. I know I would be scared to be in your shoes, but I would not rely on US courts to look out for your best interests. Please get your family involved, and ask for help.
|
| karin1957 |
|
|
Posted: 4/21/2010 9:23 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver Lurker
Female Member
Age: 50
Total Posts: 17
Raeford
North Carolina
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
| Rhiannon wrote: | It is child kidnapping if a divorce has been filed, the papers have been signed by a judge, and you have been served. It is not kidnapping, however, for you to go "on vacation" with your child, and as his mother, you are certainly the "custodial" parent. If no divorce has been filed, who can prevent you from traveling - and taking your child with you? To go home to visit long distance relatives?
If the divorce has been filed, the papers will prohibit you from taking your child out of state, and out of the country. I think you need to beat him to the punch. If you do it before he has you served, then the onus will be on him to deal with German law, and the child will be in your custody.
I know you are frightened, but I am far more concerned for you where you are not a US citizen. And if you are financially dependent on him, and he has you served, and you are not in a position to afford legal counsel??? I fear for your safety, and I also fear for your legal rights. Mostly, I am concerned about you losing your child. I can tell you that men like this don‘t play fair and are not concerned about your personal rights.
I don‘t normally give advice like this. I know I would be scared to be in your shoes, but I would not rely on US courts to look out for your best interests. Please get your family involved, and ask for help. |
you realy sure that i can go, but how i can make a passport for my son without that he know that.
I don‘t understand that the lawer and the german embassy told me that i can‘t go .
thanks for telling me that all. I talk with my family again and let them know.
|
| Moogleangelgirl |
|
|
Posted: 4/26/2010 8:29 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 33
Total Posts: 431
Where I live
Texas
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
Sind
Sie sicher, Ihr Mann will sich scheiden lassen? Wollen Sie wirklich, ihn zu verlassen? Ich
weiß, Sie haben Angst, und er ist die Kontrolle des Geldes, aber er
könnte tun, denn Sie scheinen besorgt, und er hat Angst, wirst du mit
deinem Sohn laufen. Er hätte Angst vor der gleichen Sache, die Sie haben
Angst, zu verlieren dein Sohn. Hat Ihr Sohn
die Liebe seines Vaters? Würden Sie Ihren Sohn zu verletzen, indem er ihn weit
weg von seinem Vater? Sie müssen von allen Beteiligten in die Lage zu denken. Ich weiß noch
nicht vollständig kennen deine Geschichte, ich weiß, er wird Ihnen die
Kontrolle und das ist nicht gut, aber wenn man einen Job er weniger
Kontrolle über das Geld bekommen. Er
kann keine Kontrolle über die Geld Sie verdienen.
|
| Moogleangelgirl |
|
|
Posted: 4/26/2010 11:14 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 33
Total Posts: 431
Where I live
Texas
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
| karin1957 wrote: |
| moogleangelgirl wrote: | | Sind Sie sicher, Ihr Mann will sich scheiden lassen? Wollen Sie wirklich, ihn zu verlassen? Ich weiß, Sie haben Angst, und er ist die Kontrolle des Geldes, aber er könnte tun, denn Sie scheinen besorgt, und er hat Angst, wirst du mit deinem Sohn laufen. Er hätte Angst vor der gleichen Sache, die Sie haben Angst, zu verlieren dein Sohn. Hat Ihr Sohn die Liebe seines Vaters? Würden Sie Ihren Sohn zu verletzen, indem er ihn weit weg von seinem Vater? Sie müssen von allen Beteiligten in die Lage zu denken. Ich weiß noch nicht vollständig kennen deine Geschichte, ich weiß, er wird Ihnen die Kontrolle und das ist nicht gut, aber wenn man einen Job er weniger Kontrolle über das Geld bekommen. Er kann keine Kontrolle über die Geld Sie verdienen. |
I‘m sure he wont a divore. He got a girlfriend since last year and he stay every weekend with her and stay over night. I told him to move out but he don‘t. Today He told me i must move out at end off may i will see what he do and when i don‘t. and again he treat me to file for fullcustody. I had on the weekend a cousin staying and i was going with them to the chinese place and i charged our bankcard with 10.20 dollar and he was getting mad with me and told me i give his money out. He told me he would the the bankcard from me and everything in the house. I still try to find out to get a lawyer for free. But like a said legal aid don‘t help i‘m not a american citizen. I hope i found soon help.
|
Haben Sie darüber nachgedacht, die Kirche zu gehen, um Hilfe? Ich weiß es nicht, wenn Sie die Kirche besuchen, aber
manchmal können sie mit Situationen, die hoffnungslos scheinen zu
helfen. Sie könnten in
der Lage sein, zumindest finden Sie einen Job und einen Platz für dich
und deinen Sohn zu bleiben, während Sie die Dinge aussortiert. Wenn Sie Hilfe benötigen, rufen diese Plätze wegen der
Sprachbarriere, lass es mich wissen und ich helfen kann. Ich muss nur wissen, in welchem Bereich man in so kann ich
versuchen, dich zu finden aus der Kirche helfen, in Ihrer Nähe sind. Bevorzugen Sie mich auf Deutsch zu schreiben? Ich verwende Google für diese zu übersetzen.
|
| Moogleangelgirl |
|
|
Posted: 4/26/2010 11:17 AM |
|
Subject: can he kick me out the house |
|
|
|
WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 33
Total Posts: 431
Where I live
Texas
United States
offline
Invite To Chat Room
Send Note
|
Auch mit einer Kirche hinter
sich haben, könnten Sie eine bessere Chance auf eine mündliche
Verhandlung Sorgerecht haben. Das ist kein Versprechen, aber es konnte nicht alles noch
schlimmer machen.
|