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| gogogreengo |
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Posted: 8/23/2009 2:47 PM |
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Subject: 1st post, can‘t tell anyone else... |
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New WomanSaver
Female Member
Age: 35
Total Posts: 1
Jackson Hole
Wyoming
United States
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Hey there,
This is my first post, so bear with me if it has already been covered before. My Boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, and we have gotten more and more comfortable together. I say that because we sometimes will watch porn together (I really don‘t mind that stuff, I know he watches it and it has never been an issue for us). Well, the other night we were in our camper and he was messing with his computer. We were facing each other and i couldn‘t see over the back of the laptop (like Battleship) but i could see a reflection of a woman in his glasses. I got up and looked over, and he quickly minimized the movie he had just begun watching! AT that very same time he was asking me what I wanted to do for the evening, he was watching porn and then hiding it! I got extremely upset and felt incredibly disrespected. It wasn‘t so much the actual porn that bothered me (Again, we sometimes watch it together) but it was that i felt insignificant and disrespected that he would even THINK to watch it RIGHT in front of me! He tried to apologize, said he only minimized because he was so embarrassed, and it was only on for 30 seconds. He later went on to say how stupid it was and he just wasn‘t thinking. I want to believe him but is there more going on here?
Am I wrong for thinking this is a red flag? I mean, I don‘t want to be a double standard being that i will watch it with him from time to time - but then again, there IS a time and a place and right in front of me is certainly not it...
Thanks for listening to me vent everyone :)
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| Funnysl |
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Posted: 8/24/2009 3:04 PM |
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Subject: 1st post, can‘t tell anyone else... |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 40
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Total Posts: 5026
sunshine and daisies
Wyoming
United States
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| gogogreengo wrote: | Hey there,
This is my first post, so bear with me if it has already been covered before. My Boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, and we have gotten more and more comfortable together. I say that because we sometimes will watch porn together (I really don‘t mind that stuff, I know he watches it and it has never been an issue for us). Well, the other night we were in our camper and he was messing with his computer. We were facing each other and i couldn‘t see over the back of the laptop (like Battleship) but i could see a reflection of a woman in his glasses. I got up and looked over, and he quickly minimized the movie he had just begun watching! AT that very same time he was asking me what I wanted to do for the evening, he was watching porn and then hiding it! I got extremely upset and felt incredibly disrespected. It wasn‘t so much the actual porn that bothered me (Again, we sometimes watch it together) but it was that i felt insignificant and disrespected that he would even THINK to watch it RIGHT in front of me! He tried to apologize, said he only minimized because he was so embarrassed, and it was only on for 30 seconds. He later went on to say how stupid it was and he just wasn‘t thinking. I want to believe him but is there more going on here?
Am I wrong for thinking this is a red flag? I mean, I don‘t want to be a double standard being that i will watch it with him from time to time - but then again, there IS a time and a place and right in front of me is certainly not it...
Thanks for listening to me vent everyone :) |
Would you rather that he hide it from you?
I think I would be pissed if I came home and found out that my man had been sitting in front of a computer all day watching porn.
This is my opinion only, porn is degrading. I can‘t stand it at all! I have tried to watch it and the bad acting is to much for me.
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| Kitty Kitty |
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Posted: 8/25/2009 10:16 AM |
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Subject: 1st post, can‘t tell anyone else... |
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WomanSaver MoFo
Female Member
Age: 4659
Total Posts: 356
Americas Finest Citee
California
United States
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| gogogreengo wrote: | Hey there,
This is my first post, so bear with me if it has already been covered before. My Boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half, and we have gotten more and more comfortable together. I say that because we sometimes will watch porn together (I really don‘t mind that stuff, I know he watches it and it has never been an issue for us). Well, the other night we were in our camper and he was messing with his computer. We were facing each other and i couldn‘t see over the back of the laptop (like Battleship) but i could see a reflection of a woman in his glasses. I got up and looked over, and he quickly minimized the movie he had just begun watching! AT that very same time he was asking me what I wanted to do for the evening, he was watching porn and then hiding it! I got extremely upset and felt incredibly disrespected. It wasn‘t so much the actual porn that bothered me (Again, we sometimes watch it together) but it was that i felt insignificant and disrespected that he would even THINK to watch it RIGHT in front of me! He tried to apologize, said he only minimized because he was so embarrassed, and it was only on for 30 seconds. He later went on to say how stupid it was and he just wasn‘t thinking. I want to believe him but is there more going on here?
Am I wrong for thinking this is a red flag? I mean, I don‘t want to be a double standard being that i will watch it with him from time to time - but then again, there IS a time and a place and right in front of me is certainly not it...
Thanks for listening to me vent everyone :) |
When it‘s to the point that he‘s doing it pretty much in front of you, but doesn‘t want you to see it (meaning not being truthful about his actions) it may have turned into an addiction. I mean he can‘t wait for you to leave the room even?
Men can and do get addicted to porn...It sounds like he‘s got some red flags...
Just because you watch it with him does not mean that it‘s ok to hide it from you....he obviously knows it bothers you and continues to do it...
Update?? Did you sit and talk with him about how it makes you feel???
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