WomanSavers.com Forum / CATCH A CHEATER / He is Gone Again............

Well, here I sit alone, kids are in bed and it is Friday night. He is gone to the OW house....he tells me before he leaves it is my fault and he calls me on his way there to ask me how I feel about "sending" him there all the time and if I was "nice" to him he wouldnt go there.  I hate this, it was one thing in the beginning to suspect he was doing something, but now I know it is worse...I dont know what to do. Everyone tells me to put him out and I dont know why I dont I guess I just dont want to be alone and have to face the fact our marriage is a sham. I know everyone in our community knows and I feel stupid everytime I go to the store. I feel everyone is looking at me and thinking how stupid I am for putting up with it. I have known for 7 months now and nothing is changing. Im tired all the time and hubby is sleeping on the couch now all the time, saying he doesnt feel welcome in our bed anymore. He does still have sex though and most nights I fall asleep watching tv with him on the couch anyways.  Seems like he is going there staying all night about every 7 days now.  Home for 7 then gone for 1 or 2.  I dont like sharing and I feel this is sick!!! I dont understand why the OW does this either Im not sure who is more stupid............sorry Im rambling but it is late and I am totally bored. I wish I would wake up and this whole thing would be a nightmare. Most days I have pains in my chest from the anxiety and I wake up with my heart racing in the morning. I wish I could just wake up one morning with something normal on my mind for a change.  I guess I was just wondering if there is anyone else out there that is knowingly staying with a cheating husband and get their input and what excuses the man uses as to why he still cheats after getting caught.  I get all the blame and my husband calls me the homewrecker!!!!!!!!!! anyways, if anyone has gotten to the end I thank you for reading....

Please do not waste any more of your time on this relationship. Here is a list of thing you need to do for yourself.

 1. Get yourself to the doctor and ask to be screened for STD‘s and ask about counseling and the anxiety attacks. 

 2. Get yourself a great divorce lawyer.

3.Go to the store and buy a big box of Hefty trash bags and bring home.

4.Call a locksmith and have them come out and change ALL locks .

5.Pack the jerks crap in the Hefty bags and put outside on the porch.

6.Call the jerk and inform that you are taking the trash out permentally.

7.Sit back and enjoy your children and let the ho-bag take care of him.

Rarefoxx I am not going to sugar coat this.  You might not like me after what I have to say but sometimes someone needs to grab us and shake some sense into us.  You sweetie need just that!

I know you love him.  I know you want your family together.  I KNOW HOW SCARY CHANGE IS!!! 

You are letting your children see this.  Their male role model is not a good one.  You are also saying it ok for men to do this to women.  You ARE letting him go to her. 

Seriously, you need to talk to lawyer asap.  You need to see where you are going to stand financially and what you need to do to get on with your life. 

This man does not respect you or your family.  He is all about himself.  He is not going to miraculously change.  So you need to take the bull by the horns and correct this mess.  If you stay you will be miserable.  If you leave it will be hard, it will be a process.  It will suck.

But guess what?  You will have your self respect back.  You will be stronger.  You will be showing your children that it is not ok to hurt the ones you love.  You will be ok in the end.  Tons of women move on and do just fine! 

With all that said I hope you take it to heart.  You may not like it.  You don‘t have to.  I just feel that NO ONE deserves to be treated like a door mat.  You deserve better!  But only you can make a change!

"I dont I guess I just dont want to be alone"

Swettie you already are alone, don‘t you see that.  Every time he leaves your house to go to her, you are alone.  Hell, it sounds as though you are alone even when he is there. I know it is difficult, but listen to the smart, beautiful women from this website, you need to take care of you and your kids and show him and everyone that you love and respect yourself too much to allow ANYONE to hurt ad disrespect you that way!  It‘s time to

F**k that!!!! get out of there asap. i think you have forgotten what its like to be in a normal realtionship. he wants to have his cake and eat it to. what you need to do is one day/night when he is over the skanks house is change the locks and put all of his stuff outside and hope it rains he might tell you its your fault hes doing this well its most certainly not its his way of feeling better about the terrible thing he is doing to you. he has brainwashed you listen to me you deserve way way way better and i can tell just by your post . your good people and he is not!!! bad people dont deserve good ones like us kick him out and if that doesnt work leave!!!!!

my favorite ;)